A VISIT TO THE NUTTY NORWEGIANS
- or -
HOW TO MAKE A FOOL OF YOURSELF IN TWENTY LANGUAGES
- or -
A TRIP UP NORTH WITH CRONOS WARCHILD
- or -
OH BEAUTIFUL NORWAY I LOVED THEE...
- or -
CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF A FEMALE KIND
- or -
HOW TO MAKE A NERVOUS WRECK OUT OF YOUR BIORHYTHM
- or -
SHIT, WHAT'S THAT TOWEL DOING IN THERE?
- or -
WHERE DID ALL THOSE OSES COME FROM?
- or -
A NUTTY IMPRESSION OF A CERTAIN PART OF NORTHERN EUROPE
- or -
ON THE RUN FOR THE GREENHOUSE EFFECT
- or -
NIGHTMARE ON BJØRKEVEGEN PART XIX
- or -
INTERLUDE TO THE ENCYCLOPAEDIA NORWEGICA
- or -
A FIRST LESSON IN NORWEGIAN FOR TRAVELLERS
- or -
THE HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE TO NORWAY
- or -
ENGLISH FOR NUTTIES
by Stefan, Richard, Ronny, Lars-Erik, Torbjørn, Karl Anders,
Frøystein, Gard, Elin, Ole J., Morten, Bent, Kjetil, Bjørn,
Simen, Knis (the cat), Hanne-Mari, Anne-Grete and Bjørge
All individual people writing in this article are entirely
responsible for what they have written. No responsibility
whatsoever goes to the editorial staff of ST NEWS, unless where
they have written themselves.
You might at times be left wondering about the rather strange
setup of this article. Please remember that this article was not
only 'real time' typed, but also recorded on a walkman and later
typed out. This might result even in two stories being told at
the same time...
Part VI - Monday, January 1st 1990
"New year, new decade, new everything!"
Smoke (from the cigarettes to light the firework) is hurting my
throat, I am drunk and my hands are frozen.
We went to a party all right: EVERYBODY went utterly drunk, and
just about everybody wanted to do SOMETHING was everybody else.
After the party (and calling Miranda, sigh...) we went down to
the Esso station where just about everybody was actually DOING
everything with everybody. It was very interesting, and although
I must have been there for about one hour, it seemed as though
only a quarter of an hour had passed. It was a feeling as if
there was just one large family, and I can only say that it would
have been perfect only if Miranda would have been there.
I am feeling very tired, and I am here with Lord HackBear, Ole
J. and Morten as well as Elin and Lars-Erik.
I feel tired (didn't I write that already?) and I think the rest
wants to write something, too.
See ya all tomorrow.
I just hope Stefan won't find some victim for his animal lusts
and taek (<- a spelling mistake Richard! LHB) her to the camper
(where I have to sleep, too).
Well guys, a year has gone (indeed a whole decade). In fact this
was my first year with an ST computer and indeed lots of things
have happened, I started getting involved with certain dutch guys
(crazy letters and stuff) I learned how to program in 68000, I
got Devpac (one of the best things that happened in 1989!), I
started coding demos, I got my music-ripping obsession and in
fact I met the two greatest ST freaks around. Quite some year! As
usual most inhabitants of Ørsta celebrated the new year at the
local Esso (Exxon), Stefan looked quite at home with strange
looks in his eyes! The celebration is really quite insane,
everybody lights their fireworks and points it in all kind of
directions (even at the Esso station). This is of course really
dangerous and totally illegal, because a sign at the station
declares that smoking and all use of fire is forbidden. Richard
also smashed one more or less empty bottle (not his own)
something which could have costed him 1000 NOKs if the police had
seen him, but as "usual" they were not to be seen. By the way,
Richard went to bed at around 01:30, considering the day he just
had (Norwegian montains, parties, Esso stations and smoking), I
think I am able to understand him.
By the way, the Thalion Sound Demo is severely hacked, packed
and is now to be found on one of my disks as a 357 kilobytes
"click-able" file. I'll give it to Richard tomorrow.
The Hackbear & Co went downtown some time ago to try to find
Stefan before he rapes some girl called Anna, and Ronny and his
girlfriend (Yes! Ronny started something deep and beautiful
with Anne-Grete!! Congratulations! ED.) also went downtown. Elin
just went to bed and I'm sitting here all alone listening to the
NRK (Norwegian broadcasting corporation) and the "listeners
request" program. Ronny's ST is still playing "Super Sprint" by
itself and I feel so tired that I could sleep for a week....
Ørsta looks like my kinda town allright!
Uptill now, everybody has been totally, utterly and very, very
drunk. Everybody, from 16-year-olds to God-knows-how-olds. I have
been hugged and kissed by the craziest girls and I have been to
some sort of club in a place that looked like it would fall apart
any moment. It is a diving club so I hear from the Oses who
were also there. They brought me back here and I am indeed
grateful to them for else I would have been left somewhere in
Ørsta and I don't have the faintest idea how to find Ronny's
place. Anyway, the Esso-orgy was quite amazing indeed. I have
never seen so many drunks at the same place. We talked to some
juvenile (16) girl who was talking about all sorts of things
involving the creation of little humans. She was very, very
drunk. I think there will be a lot of people in Ørsta tomorrow
who will feel very bad in the morning.
By the way, Ronny is not here....I wonder where he might be....
Also, Richard has gone to bed hours ago....that sissy.
I am quite tired but if there is any party anywhere in Ørsta, I
wouldn't hesitate a moment and rush off there....
Well, I'm the guy that has been driving all night here in Ørsta.
I'm not drunk! Now, I have driven Stefan to Ronny's house, and I
think I should just drive home and find my bed. So good night
folks, I am leaving now. The Ose-gang is really going home (at
This is the tired Morten speaking....Ole just reminded me about
Monthy Python's humour. I got to go to bed now!!!!
I'm home; very cold and very lucky! What I hoped would happen
happened. So, let's sleep...! By the way, the party was great
even though I didn't get drunk at all. I've never before felt so
sober during/after a party, but maybe that has something to do
with the emotional condition I've been in this entire day.
I just woke up; thoughts of a devastated Ørsta litter my mind.
The employees at the local Esso station will now be having fun!
Since I've been singing rather loud with Stefan last night, my
voice has gone slightly.
Yeah...a new decennium. New chances for the ST and the Lynx...
Extensive deepening of my relationship with Miranda....
I am looking forward to it.
While making some positively bestial sounds, I actually get out
of bed and move my butt in the house.
Coughing violently from the 'deafening cries' of last night, and
supplied with fresh band aids around my bleeding wounds, I am
here again in Ronny's room, getting to wake up to "Mandatory
Elin is also awake, and brought another one of her little
miniature friends - this time a girl called Eli Janne. They are
both, for some reason or another, dressed up in thick winter
Maybe another weird Norwegian habit?
In a second, I will write more about last night.
Now for a bigger description of all that happened last night,
while Elin and her little friend are playing "Bubble Bobble",
Lars-Erik is awake, Ronny is molesting the cat (Knis) and Stefan
At well over nine on the last day of the decade, we went over to
the place of a guy called Asbjørn (which is pronounced like
Osbjørn). As we found out within a couple of minutes, it was
evident that all humans present only had one goal:
GET UTTERLY MINDDECAYINGLY PISSED!!
So I sat and started to drink, too. For the purpose of hooking
the Norwegians, we had brought a filled bottle of Plantiac with
us, and soon everybody was trying Plantiac'ed Cokes. They all
Whereas earlier we were only confronted with A: Ugly females or
B: Very young females, we were now confronted with some pretty
neat ones in all colours and versions. And I must admit there
were a couple to my liking, including one that Stefan (as hinted
at before) was desperately after later: Mariann (before that, he
actually wanted to do something with one called Anna, but I lost
All 16-and 17 year old girls here look like they are 20 or 21,
and when you say so they almost start kissing your feet and feel
Stefan soon found out, and started telling to all girls that he
thought they looked like they were 20 (or, indeed, 21). All girls
that wanted to do something with me (yes, there were a couple,
and this is a prime example of the general distaste of Norwegian
girls) made me instantly fall in love even deeper (with Miranda,
that is). I missed her like I have never missed her before, and
when I called her at twelve (midnight) I could almost cry when I
heard her voice and she said that she missed me and felt terribly
"All Norwegian girls that are 16 or 17 years old have libido
Yours truly quote
Soon after twelve, I balanced my drunken being outside to blast
some fireworks, after which we went to the notorious Esso fuel
Soon, it was apparent that just about every youth in Ørsta was
hanging around there, lighting fireworks, drinking, and doing
everything with everybody. I soon lost track of Stefan, who was
at the time after Anna. The glare in his eyes wasn't strange to
me. It was PURE ANIMAL LUST!
But I did find Lord HackBear, Ole J. and Morten.
We chatted a bit, and before we knew it was past one and I felt
Oops. I have to have breakfast. I'll go further in a minute or
I feel slightly feeble as I now am fully awake and am able to
look upon the happenings of the last night with a clear eye. I
don't really have a hangover but I also don't really like to have
breakfast and a cup of tea is all I am drinking now.
So what happened?
To tell you the truth, I don't actually quite really remember
what happened exactly (er...), but a rough description can be
pulled from my tired brain coils.
On Asbjørn's party it dawned upon me that the Norwegian girls
are quite loose when they had a couple of drinks and soon got
hung up on a girl called Anna. Now I did have quite some drinks
as well (ranging from Plantiac to beer to vicious home-brewed
liquor and an alcoholic cassis called Cassandra) and soon I
started enjoying sweet-talking those girls a lot. Now my being
foreign surely helped a lot because they all told me how much
they liked speaking English and so on. A girl called Mariann also
drew my attention (a lot) and she was with her boyfriend (Paul,
who was all over a girl sitting next to him). Anyway, at twelve
we all were very drunk and went outside to light the fireworks.
We lost about half of it but who cares. After that, we went to
the Esso station and on our way, we cried the most deafening
cries ever to come from the mouths of the ST NEWS staff.
When we arrived there, a sight most amusing and amazing was
displayed before me. A whole bunch of people (at least three
hundred of them) were drinking, talking, lighting fireworks and
doing lots of other things that happen when a lot of drunken
teenagers get together. The later it became the more amusing it
got. Sometimes I would bump into a girl and say 'Godt Nyttår'
(meaning Happy Newyear) and they would immediately hug and kiss
me like they knew me for years. After they found out I was not
Norwegian, they stuck to me like bees to a jar of honey. I found
and lost Anna a couple of times and I also found and lost Mariann
a couple of times. I ran into the latter in some sort of club to
which I was only admitted after I convinced the bouncer that I
really should get in there to make my evening complete and doing
it in English, made it only more convincing. I was dragged from
it by the Oses (Lord HackBear was as sober as a Buddhist Monk)
half an hour later (just when I met this really nice girl who was
(for a change) about 21 years old) and we went back to Esso.
After beholding several people lying on the floor and being told
by a sixteen year old girl that she experienced a devastating
urge for fourteen hours of passionate sexual intercourse with me,
we wisely decided to go home. They dropped me off at Ronny's
place and the rest is a lot of sleep....
Breakfast was plentiful as usual, and was interluded by some
strange happenings in the kitchen: The cat was being licked and
bitten by eight Papillons, and underwent this with perfect
serenitude. It walked away slowly, with its back bent under the
weight of the dogs that clung to it (and on it).
And now I am back.
And where was I with my story? I must take care not to write the
same that Stefan wrote, but since our ways parted fairly soon (I
love Miranda too much to become divulged in FLESHLY LUST and
hitch off with as many other females as possible) I guess there's
no immediate danger of this happening.
Ole J. drove me home (to Ronny's place) and I typed down the
message a couple of pages back. Then I dashed off to the camper
and fell in a sleep in which I was only troubled with the sheer
thought that Miranda was at that instant lonely and far away from
me (1.5 hours of flying and 11 hours of driving added together,
to be more precise).
When I looked in the mirror, I was shocked to notice that I had
a healthy red blush on my face - something that I had also
noticed when I came back from the mountain yesterday. This cold,
clean Norwegian air is surely doing things to me!
Mucky Pup is now devastating the silence here, and I must say
that it's really neat to hear it again after three hours of Rod
Stewart in Asbjørn's place.
I am sick !!!
Elin sure is sick. She behaves like she has a hangover, but she
insists that she hasn't tasted one single drop of anything
stronger than Coke (we wouldn't know what she were doing while we
devestated Ørsta last night). I however must be the only person
in Ørsta without a hangover.....
Hey, Lars-Erik...I don't have a hangover for sure!
The ultimate apocolypsial catastrophe has just struck us:
This is, of course, a disaster the likes of which have never
before shuddered the earth (at least, not the immediate vicinity
of the parts of the earth we've walked on).
So I guess we're now in some REALLY DEEP shit, if you get my
drift. I can already imagine our throats drying and rippling -
and my throat is already sore and dry as it is (after the
I think I will save my energy for a while now and quit typing.
"All people eating, making or distributing Brunost should be
Ronny just told us that Frøykid will be coming this evening!
He will go mountain climbing tomorrow, too (Lord HackBear as
Outside, it is now already getting dark again. Another severe
blow of ultimately epic proportions to my biorhythm.
"If you want to do it, do it. And if you don't do it, flush the
The lack of Coke is making me a bit confused now. I've spent
the last hour filling in some pages in a book called 'Best
Friends' that belongs to Elin. The first part was quite normal,
name, address and so on. But the rest was quite absurd, ranging
from 'Burnt humour' to 'Wrong mirror'. It was very hard to come
up with some original answers to these 'questions'.
Elin and her little friend are still busy playing Bubble Bobble.
They have been doing it for the last couple of hours.
Ronny looks a bit dazed, I think his mind is far away, with a
certain girl...sometimes, he looks up with a broad grin on his
face when he probably remembers some of the things that happened
last night. Anyway, I am happy for the guy ("And so am I" -
Richard quote), finding girlfriends is always something that
makes you feel very good.
We are all sitting here a bit lazy, pondering the things that
happened the last couple of days. Tomorrow will be a tiring day I
suspect so I'd better get a lot of rest...
Lars-Erik is lying like a corpse on Ronny's bed annex couch,
Elin is feeling sick, Stefan is unusually silent and Ronny is
swarming through the pink mists of love... Add to that that it is
pitch dark outside and Norwegian television only broadcasts
trash, and you'll understand why it makes ME even feel slightly
sick in the stomach.
And it makes me feel even more devastatingly lonely. I want to
be with Miranda, and not even five hundred Nutty Norwegians,
thousand Lord HackBears and a million horny Norwegian 16-year old
females will be able to change the fact that I will be with
Miranda next year at this time.
Alltogether I am afraid that I don't feel particularly nice
Elin just hopped off to the toilet, and I am afraid that she is
there to do some heavy puking. And she didn't drink anything
except Coke? Maybe we should have poured some heavenly Plantiac
down her throat...she would surely have felt better.
I will now go on a Plantiac retrieval quest with Ronny.
We're back, although we didn't succeed in retrieving anything -
Asbjørn was not home (or still in a coma or something). But we
did get some IFA Pastilles, Bounty (yes!) and......COKE!! It was
very hard to get Coke, though. There was only ONE 1 litre bottle
of the real stuff left, so we also had to get some half litle
bottles (we took six).
So I guess we're all pretty content right now. Stefan also
bought some extra film, thus enabling him to take pictures again.
It was cold in town, actually. It was the kind of cold that you
would prefer to be slightly warmer, if you get my drift (I seem
to be writing that a lot these days....I'll have to find a
different expression soon! (If you get my drift)).
Well, I'm pretty sure now that I have no hangover today. It is a
bit surprising after all the alcohol that passed my throat last
night. But then again, I ate a LOT at dinner (Mrs. Hatlemark sure
knows how to prepare some GREAT food) and that is a good base for
lotsa alcohol. It is a very reassuring feeling that the fridge is
filled with (be it 1/2 litre) bottles of Coke. Also, we are
munching IFA (did you know that they have been invented by a guy
called Ivar F. Andresen who was an Opera singer) again (the black
box ones are even better) and some candybars. But I won't eat too
much, for else dinner would be wasted on me and I don't want that
Metallica's "One" CD single (the rare one, with "Bread Fan" and
the "One" session version) is now bringing some atmosphere into
the room and I feel truly and excellently great! I feel as though
I can conquer the world today (though no mountain tomorrow).
Stefan is loudly singing to "Sanitarium", and I sing along
happily. It's just BLOOMIN' GREAT!
But I have to remember that this is a computer magazine and
write less about these sort of trivial subjects.
(Though I already think I will fail at this)
DINNER! (I KNOW I AM REPEATING MYSELF...)
Dinner was truly great. Everybody ate just TOO MUCH and now not
only Elin is feeling sick but several other people too (like me).
Richard, Elin and Stefan are playing Super Sprint again. Elin
drives like she is utterly totally mindlessly drunk (or sick).
Elin got slighty agitated just now and she spilled forth an
endless stream of very incomprehensible Norwegian words. Only the
way she said it told me that the words were not describing the
sweetness of her rabbit but expressed harsh feelings of anger.
Richard just told me that she is a very hot girl (With fever,
that is, he just felt her forehead).
The dogs are going mad outside. There must be Oses
No!! It's Frøystein!!!!!!!
Yeah, I'm here, after several days of partying and unhealthy
behaviour. It's very hard to type now, as it is very cold
Mr. Jan P. Syse, Norway's very popular prime minister is now
speakingon the TV. He's talking about the failure of communism,
and some more bigwig babble that is of even less interest to the
reader than the other stuff we are doing here. 'You can go
surfing on those things', Stefan said (he said some more things,
too, things which I will not quote here).
Some more people came into the room, people who I don't know,
and people who I will try to get to write something.
This is BB talking. I'm sitting in a small room in Ørsta. I can
hear loud music, and a lot of people talking about their
favourite computer, which of course is the ST. Someone told me to
watch my mouth, so I'd better say that the ST is a very good
I've got an Amiga, which I never use. I prefer my Commodore PC
30 III, which is really good. You see, I only use the computer
for my homework - writing letters, etc. I'm thinking about
buying the new Atari Stacy 4. I have heard it is very good, but
it's probably too expensive in Norway.
I don't know anything more to write, so I'd better stop.
Apart from the above Bjørge, a guy called Erlend also dropped
in. He actually has an ST, and just beat Ronny with "Super
Sprint". This game seems to be pretty hot at the moment, and now
Lars-Erik and Frøystein are playing it.
Bjørge is now reading the English magazine "ST World" which
Ronny just gave him. It contains a review of the Stacy and I can
already see him drool at the mere sight of pictures of a computer
so superior to his.
Ronny just entered the room again, with a bag of Potato Crisps
with Dill taste (I actually don't know if 'Dill' is English...)
and it isn't bad.
But I prefer Paprika.
During all this time, Guns & Roses' "Appetite for Destruction"
is slicing the silence in the room (at the moment "Sweet Child of
"She's got eyes of the bluest kind
I'd hate to look into these eyes
And see an ounce of pain..."
Guns & Roses vocalist quote
"Pling plong plong
Pling plong plong
Tweetie pling plong plang
Wee wee wah wah wang wang weeeee..."
Guns & Roses guitarist quote
Just now, Ole J. and Morten came dropping in again, though they
left the HackBear home for the moment (so it seems). Someone else
quit "Super Sprint" and they are now playing "Bubble Bobble"
again (Frøykid and Erlend).
And I'm still eating IFA pastilles.
They are very nice.
And Lars-Erik is driving me nuts.
These Norwegians surely know how to get rid of Dill flavoured
crisps in a fast way...
"Make space, not war!"
Morten quote (when wanting to sit down on a crowded bed annex
"Well...shred the proof!"
Mucky 'Reagan' Pup quote
"Take that shredder and....pull Ronny's ass through!!"
Mucky Pup quote (Volume II)
"Oh my God, Holy Jeepers!
What, are you f@cking nuts?"
Mucky Pup quote (Volume III)
"Na na na na na
Na na na na na
Na na na na na
Na na na na na
Na na naaaa..."
Mucky Pup quote (Volume IV and end)
Well, here we go again! I have to write some words about two
of the most inspiring and interesting persons in the whole
ST World. I'm of course talking about Stefan & Richard (thanks
humongously much! ED.). I met them for the first time in my
life in the local Post-office here in Ørsta. I have seen the
'ST NEWS Home Video' and when I saw them outside as I was
driving to the office, I immediately recognized them. They
went inside, and so did I. I introduced my self to them, and
they shook my hand and looked like two really nice and
friendly guys. During the past days I have learned to know
them better and better. It's amazing how fast and how well they
understand what I'm saying. My English is far from perfect, but
communicating is certainly no problem.
These two guys are really the kind of persons that make life
worth living, and they inspires me to write this very text.
Well, now I have been talking kind words about Stefan &
Richard for a long while. It's time for me to change the
subject. To quote Monty Python: "And now for something
completely different". My reason for quoting Monty Python is
that I am now going to talk a bit about this crazy gang of
Englishmen that in the 70ies were perhaps the most famous
comedians in Europe. The gang made several films, and they
also had a serie in English television that they called "Flying
Circus". The series continued for several months in England.
Now I have mentioned the Monty Python gang several times. Maybe I
should explain who actually was the gang. The gang consisted of:
John Cleese (you have probably seen him in the great movie "A
fish called Wanda", and in lots of other films), Eric Idle,
Graham Chapman (he died 11.10.89, R.I.P.), Terry Jones, Michael
Palin (he appered in "A fish called Wanda" together with John
Cleese) and Terry Gillian. The reason for me to mention Monty
Python in this realtime-article is that I am very stunned and
amazed by their crazy and strange sence of humour. They can
make the most boring theme to look like the funniest thing you
ever saw. These days I try as hard as I can to get hold of all
the films they made. There is also another reason for me to
write about Monty Python now. Yesterday or more corectly about
03:20 today I talked to Stefan and he said that he had seen
all the films, and the whole "Flying Circus" serial. He said that
they are some of the funniest people he have ever seen.
And now for something completely different for the second
time: Bruce Springsteen. I mentioned somewhere earlier in this
article that I'm a great fan of him. I have bought about
everything I can get hold of that conserns him: records,
singles, CD's, T-shirts, calendars and lots of other stuff.
I first heard about Bruce in early 1984 and I immediately
became a fan of him. Back then I was only 12 years old, and it
was that year I really got hooked on music. Well, you may
wonder why I write about Bruce Springsteen in this text, what
has he got to do with Atari ST? Well, the first day (the day we
started writing this article) Richard announced that we could
write about absolutely everything in this text, and that is
actually what I am doing now. Well, my fingers are getting
tired, and I think I better stop now, before I ruin the whole
acticle with boring talk about uninteresting stuff.
Ole actually merged a file into the article so that's why it
only took one minute. Lord Hackbear just dropped in with a
completely ready Thalion Sound Demo. It is in a runnable .PRG
file now, and he is showing it right now, so I'd better hurry...
Right now there is 11 people in Ronny's room, and most of them
are Ose guys. So there isn't much space to run on!?! Stakker
Humanoid is in the CD player right now, and with a volume which
could kill anybody (except for me and some other guys). Grønnevet
(Erlend) and Bjørge Brende just left us now.
We live in a dynamic world, and therefore Stakker has been
replaced by Vangelis' "Themes". The first song, "Bladerunner End
Titles", is the only worthwhile song - but therefore a class of
its own! The bass riff is multi-maxi-mega (no, this has NOTHING
to do with a certain monster whose shit smells a lot), and I am
desperately hoping that it will be published on CD single, too.
Then I might (will) buy it.
I'm totally lacking inspiration right now. In fact, I've been
totally lacking inspiration during the whole day, and that's also
why this is my first entry at the keyboard on the first day of
our new decade.
A few hours ago I called Anne-Grete to find out if she was still
alive (and not killed on the bus like her mother thought she
would be). Everything was just fine, so I was glad to hear.
Unfortunately she has to work all day tomorrow (goods-counting at
the shop where she works), so I will probably not be seeing her
before school starts on Wednesday. Sigh...
Some Yngwie Malmsteen music is currently playing on the stereo.
This guy sure plays the guitar just "like ringing a bell", and
everything sounds great (except for the voice of the vocalist
which is too weak, I think).
Lord Hackbear's hacked version of Xenon II is now receiving
various signals from the joystick ruled by Lars-Erik.
Tomorrow I will definitely have to start on an excercise which
is supposed to be handed in to the teacher at the end of this
week. An other excercise is also going to be handed in to the
same teacher (adding up to at least 10 pages to write).
Right now, I'm a bit bored. Maybe we should begin on the
Plantiac retrieval quest part II?
The Yngwie Malmsteen music we're now listening to sure is great!
They are still playing Xenon II on Ronny's ST. We are now 8
persons in the room. Bruce Springsteen is really 'The Boss'. Dire
Straits is great too. As you may have noticed, I don't know what
to write. Maybe I should just stop before I write something
really stupid (as I usually do?). This article is now about 118KB
and that sure is great!
Lars-Erik is now playing on the last level of the great game
I am not sick anymore!
Lars-Erik has now finished playing Xenon II (he managed the
whole game, but he cheated).
Those crips surely are good, but there is one BIG disadvantage,
when somebody just ate some of them and talks to you, the smell
belching from his/her mouth will almost knock you down to the
Elin is in our midst again and she now looks a lot more healthy
than she did a few hours ago.
The music that obviously (audibously?) is Stefan's and Richard's
favouritite is again playing. Mucky pup repeats: 'DEATH BY
CHOLESTEROL' all the time, and our dear Dutchies act like persons
with a certain illness called 'Cerebral paresis' (or something
Stefan is watching me now, obviously enjoying all my typing
I have to say: Xenon II has the best graphics I ever saw on ANY
computer game. Why do I have to say it? Don't ask such intricate
Stefan is typing something on the Z88, and I think I will have a
small look at that thingie.
Hmm.. It was Dutch, so I wasn't able to read it. Perhaps I ought
to start to write Norwegian, so that you foreigners would be
unable to read it?
They are now blasting away, using Jeff Minter's "Gridrunner". It
does excellently. So the next time somebody ask you 'what do ST
users use their computers for most of the time?', you know what
to do, don't you? You ought to lie, that's what you should do!
'Do you have any interesting ideas for a shoot-em up?', Richard
asked. 'No, but we have some really good ideas for copy
protections', somebody replied. 'We don't give a f.ck about copy
protections', Richard quoth (quote, ex-ed (quoth, Frøystein)).
Richard farted again.
I guess I did.
Lars-Erik likes Mucky Pup so much, so he wants to sample it, but
unfortunately the lead to the stereo isn't long enough so he
can't do it. The foreigners are now singing 'little pigs let me
in, little pigs let me in.....'. Stefan is also playing with the
cat; Richard's taking a picture of Stefan who almost kills the
cat (just almost, because I don't think the cat liked it!?!).
Right now I'm looking at the NRK news (Stefan and Richard hate
it, I think (because it's in Norwegian)). By the, way Happy New
Ronny just arrived!
Stefan and Ronny are going on a HJQ (Holy Junkfood Quest) in
'downtown Ørsta', and by now the music has been replaced by "The
Miracle" of Queen.
I don't know what to write, actually, and since I don't I won't.
All I know is that Ronny just actually came back from what
turned out to be a PPRQ (Personal Plantiac Retrieval Quest), so I
am now happily sipping this HF (Heavenly Fluid) again. We're
living in a dynamic worlds, indeed: Michael Jackson's (bwaargh!)
"Thriller" is now slammed in the CD player.
"Hahahahahahahahaha HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA hahahahahaha...."
Michael Jackson narrator quote
I have plans about leaving this room in about 5-10-15 minutes.
Michael Jackson is still in the CD player, actually Richard
turned the volume on max, right now (and I who thought that
Richard hates Michael Jackson). Richard is about to get drunk (I
think, because he's drinking something which is not water or Coke
(don't say this to anybody!!!!!!!!)).
'Bubble Bobble is now on Ronny's ST, Elin and Ole J. are playing
This is going a bit slow, it is. Morten said he woke up at half
past twelve today. I didn't. I woke at fifteen hundred hours. And
in just a couple of days, we are supposed to be back in the
normal biorythm. Oh my, we won't!
Michael Jackson is still playing. Is this the normal behaviour
of these compumaniacs? I think the definition must be something
like 'multitasking on a parallel basis', 'cause people are
reading comics, playing computer games, yes, they're even reading
german. Just the last part usually is enough to give me a
headache! We are now witnessing the Coming of the Junk Food, and
they are going mad about it. 'CHOLESTEROL!', they are shouting,
and diving into the bags containing the unhealthy stuff. Will
these guys be able to venture into the mountains tomorrow? I
don't know. I'll just let them eat, so that they will be heaving
for breath tomorrow. I am, by the way, going healthy now (eating
crisps with other vegetables than potatoe in it). That way, I'll
not be the greatest obstacle tomorrow. Some Oses just left, and I
will now leave for a breath of fresh air.
We just returned from the 'Junk Food sub-Quest'. We brought some
fries and have devoured them within a minute. Plantiac is again
being slid down into our stomachs. Can you imagine that after a
night like last night?
The Oses have just left and I think that they are swell guys. I
am really looking forward to tomorrow when we ascend a mountain
and most probably, I will be the weakest one of them all, making
the ascend a very slow one in the eyes of Lord HackBear, who is
supposed to be an expert in mountain-climbing. I have done it
before, you know, but only in the summer and in Austria. Pretty
heavy climbing, including dangling on ropes, crossing deep
crevices with savage rivers in them. So we'll see who will be the
The room is getting a bit more serene now, it's just Richard,
Ronny (Ronnè!), Frøyyie, Lars-Erik, Elin and myself. In a few
moments, sleeping time will arrive I guess. Richard is again
being a slightly bit childish and presses F10 (=restart) on
Bubble Bobble after he loses a life, and of course he blames it
Ok, the Nutties are now marvelling at the 'Norwegian for
Travellers' book I brought. It has been quite a succes uptil now,
everybody (especially Anne-Grete) laughs their brains out when I
try to pronounce some of the phrases in there.
The last of the two Plantiac bottle was now finished, and
Richard celebrated it with one of his famous farts. Stefan
recommended a book to him: 'the art of farting - farting in bed,
farting while making love, farting while fighting, and farting in
every other possible way imaginable'.
Richard gave forth some more gas.
The text of the articles is identical to the originals like they appeared in old ST NEWS issues. Please take into consideration that the author(s) was (were) a lot younger and less responsible back then. So bad jokes, bad English, youthful arrogance, insults, bravura, over-crediting and tastelessness should be taken with at least a grain of salt. Any contact and/or payment information, as well as deadlines/release dates of any kind should be regarded as outdated. Due to the fact that these pages are not actually contained in an Atari executable here, references to scroll texts, featured demo screens and hidden articles may also be irrelevant.