"Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my
first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an
ant, and she fell on me. Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny."
THE NUTTY NORWEGIANS' HOLLAND QUEST
VOLUME THE FOURTH
This real-time article sequence all in all contains entries by,
in order of appearance, Leif Claus, Kai Holst, Richard Karsmakers
(Cronos of the Quartermass Experiment), Tjeerd Bruinsma (Scum of
Sewersoft), Jurie Horneman (Relayer of the Quartermass
Experiment), Laurens van der Klis (The Mind of the Quartermass
Experiment), Alex Crousen (The Nutty Snake of the Quartermass
Experiment) and Roeland (who is an independent, actually, whose
name just might actually be spelled with a 't' instead of a 'd').
Sadly, Lucifer (Eksod), the only other person to appear where
this article was written, did not get himself immortalized.
Ars longa! Vita brevis! Lucifer morti!
Eventually Leif called it a day (or, rather, a night) too.
Multi-billiards of tiny magnetic particles had been rearranged on
their sticky coating on long pieces of plastic wound around reels
in compact audio cassettes. Eventually, everyone went to sleep.
Everyone except the hamsters.
Everyone is getting up now. I expect we'll be in Amsterdam by
twelve o'clock, perhaps slightly sooner. That leaves us with
about five hours (perhaps more) to do some shopping there. I've
decided to take the video camera along - I hope I won't live to
regret it. I think it will be possible to do some rather
interesting shots in our beautiful nation's capital, dirty and
obscene though this city may be.
I might even join them again tomorrow, which will be the day on
which they actually take off. I am not sure about it, though, for
it would involve going to Schiphol airport again - and I'm not
even too sure whether or not you can actually penetrate the
airport security system at all when you're just toting a camera
instead of passport and boarding ticket.
Leif just told me he went to bed at about half past three. "But
at least I've got a lot of music," he said, using his fists to
scare off the sleep from his eyes.
Next week I will not have to go to school yet, so I'll have an
excellent opportunity to catch some more sleep. Also, I will
finish version 5.7 of my "Ultimate Virus Killer" (which,
incidentally, was proclaimed one of the all-over top 20 Christmas
buys in "ST Format"!). I don't think I'll get the thing any
faster, but at least I should be able to make it good enough for
it to be sold again and beat hell out of the competition. As I
think I've now reached the position of market leader (or industry
standard, or whatever), it is vitally important not to have me
kicked off that position by the competition. The only competition
at the moment seems to be Kai's "Antidote", which is actually
pretty damn excellent and exceedingly fast. I still beat it on
sheer statistics, though. In Germany, too, there are some virus
killers that are worth while keeping an eye on - they are fully
GEM compatible, which somehow makes many people buy them even
though their statistics are pukably bad. Most of them don't
recognize half of the viruses, let alone the other disks and
stuff. It shows that the programmers of these programs are out
for a fast buck with the least possible amount of research - the
programs don't recognize much yet they set you back any price
between 40 and 100 German Marks (i.e. way too much)!
Today's first music is Sodom's "Agent Orange". Stefan might not
actually be here in body, but at least he's here in spirit (well,
perhaps not even that). In his honour I thought it would be neat
to wake up the Nutties with this CD, which has been known among
other guests already to be an excellent de-sedative.
And it's quite good, too.
Once I'll get back from Amsterdam today, it will be time to
survey the damage. An almost empty fridge. Almost no Coke. A
serious decimation of Plantiac bottles. Probably the odd
Norwegian item lying around, forgotten, waiting for me to send it
after its rightful owner at significant postage costs.
I don't think I'll ever be able to listen to Bel Canto's
"Shimmering, Warm and Bright" without getting flashbacks of
Northerners insulting my toilet, drinking, lighting fireworks,
talking their funny language, and sleeping on my couch.
Now I come to think of it, I think I should probably open all
possible windows when we leave. The house, sighing deeply, will
have to get to grips with reality again - no matter how much
better reality might be.
My amplifier and CD player have worked overtime. I have worked
overtime. I think I've slept an average of five hours per night,
which is not exactly the amount I need (which is more like eight
or nine per day, really). I don't fill ill - at least not yet. I
heard they've open a Virgin Megastore in Amsterdam after the last
time I've been there. Let's hope it will be as interesting as the
one in Oxford Street, London.
This real-time article, I guess, will not reach the designated
128 Kb or more. Rather, I think we should be happy if it reaches
100 Kb once it's edited, divided and spellchecked. Although its
quantity has perhaps let you down, I am sure the quality hasn't.
Or am I and has it?
Some insane guitar thrashing going on in the background (or
foreground, considering the loudness!). Richard says it's the
best guitar-solo ever, I won't take his word for it (Actually it
is, and it's Steeler's "Hot on Your Heels" intro guitar solo by
Yngie Malmsteen, ED.)!
Well, anyway, these are our last hours in Utrecht, since I think
we will be leaving for Amsterdam in a short while. This night
didn't contain much sleep for me either, by the way. I was up
recording music until around 3:30 AM. So I haven't got my eyes
wide open yet. Well, that won't happen anyway until I put on my
contact-lenses, but still usually my eyes are a bit more unclosed
when I wake up.
The final entry to be made LIVE in Utrecht for this real-time
article. Yes, it's me (not -ME-) again. I have just finished a
shower which did miracles to a numb body (i.e. mine), and have
started packing all my things, including the Christmas presents
and computer stuff. We will in not too long a time leave for
Amsterdam, where we will do some shopping, as well as finding a
hotel to spend the night. Leif and I will be writing on his
Portfolio on the way home, so more will actually be added to this
article. Now Leif wants to take over. See ya' soon!
We're kind of popping of. Well, not some sort of faery- popping-
of or wizard-popping-of, but sort perfectly humanly leaving-by-
the-door popping-of. Bye for now!
From now on, things might be confusing. At a certain stage two
sentient entities are writing at two different locations. To help
you slightly, however, an indication will be given when locations
are changed. For the time being, we're all in Amsterdam.
On the Atari Portfolio...
We just got off the train from Utrecht. The beginning of our
return is a fact. We have left that town of immortal fun, great
times and nice people, and are currently on the lookout for a
hotel, things that are worthy of being filmed, a place to change
money, lockers for the luggage as well as stunning females (see
the above part on filming), "we" meaning myself, Leif and
Richard. The train journey was eventless; Richard was reading
something by Terry Pratchett, and Leif and I were having fun
studying a sixteen-years old who seemed to suffer from a severe
hangover (it's always fun to comment loudly on people when you
are a foreigner!). We are going to some book-, computer- and
music-shops here today, but first we have to actually find a
hotel where we can live.
Finding a hotel wasn't that hard in fact. It just meant standing
in a queue at the Tourist Information Centre for about an hour,
constantly fending off evil pick-pockets and (Hey, this is line
42 on the Portfolio!) sleazy guys offering cheap lodging... Yeah,
and also the occasional scumbag trying to sell me some cocaine
("This is AMSTERDAM," Richard reminded us time and again). Why me
by the way? Do I look like someone desperately wanting a trip of
some kind? Well, I guess I probably do!
Anyway, we finally got us a hotel and had to be there earlier
than 3 pm, meaning we had to go there straight away. Somewhat
convenient really, since we could store our luggage there. No way
had we managed to find us a locker!
Right now by the way, we are sitting at a McDonalds consuming
some proper junk-food (Actually we have finished eating, that's
why I'm typing now!), observing life around us and life around us
observing us in return. Interesting experience!
The hotel was called Verdi and looked like a nice little
backstreet hotel with a tiny oriental woman behind the counter.
Fifty Dutch guilders is probably a normal price to pay, although
that leaves at least me with very little left to shop with.
Oh, we're leaving now! Richard constantly goes around finding
interesting little bits to put on video, so I'm looking forward
to getting that vid'!
At this very moment, Richard's train is disappearing into the
horizon, or rather, out of the Central Station (almost started to
picture a sunset and a lonely tune!). We shook his hand and said
goodbye, were filmed for the last time, and then he was gone. I
almost feel sad because of this because of all the good times
we've had with this guy and his lovely companion in life (not
Leif). Ahhh, nostalgic memories run through my head as we stand
in the middle of Amsterdam Central. People are watching us with
dumb looks, so we have decided to catch the first tram back to
the hotel. The tram, by the way, is number five.
Yeah, it's me again. We are currently sitting/lying in our
bedroom at Verdi's. Leif is writing some postcards to friends,
whereas I already finished that a few minutes ago. I wrote to
Jen, the love of my life (not Leif) and some of my penfriends
(both being girls), plus an old classmate whom I had promised a
card. Leif and I are going to go out later on to have something
to drink and eat (in that order of priority), and we are excited
about what we might dump into in a city this size. Hopefully, we
will manage to stay out of trouble.
Well, only three kB so far on the Portfolio. Now I shall rest.
The fact that I was writing postcards while Kai was writing on
this, derives from the simple truth that we actually have only
got one pen! Multitasking? Nope, no way man! Feels like a fucking
Amiga (swearing is inevitable when naming such a lame thingy).
As Kai said (wrote), we will be going out soon in order to find
something to satisfy our digestive system with. But right now we
are just relaxing in our tiny hotel-room. And I mean tiny! It
would probably be more than big enough for those oriental micro-
organisms (some very cute ones by the way, although they barely
reach my waist!) downstairs, but for full-sized Norwegian vikings
(ahem!)? I think not!
Party time! Excellent ("Wayne's World" quote)! Heading for town!
Hopefully also for fun! Bye!
Meanwhile, in a different personal universe, on an Atari ST...
Sadness. Sadness. Even more sadness.
Or perhaps not.
It is strangely silent here in Utrecht, Looplantsoen 50. The
Northern chaps have been dropped in Amsterdam, after a shopping
spree that made sure all of 'em got all the presents they wanted
to take back home. We parted at 17:19, when my train left back to
Something will baffle you if you continue unprepared now,
reading further entries in this real-time article. First of all,
you should realize that all entries after 10:45 were made in two
completely separate personal universes. One universe consists of
two Vikings and their Atari Portfolio, and the other consists of
me and my Atari ST. These have been mixed together (for
convenience I'll use the past tense here, though at this moment
in time it's future tense for me) later to form an intricate
double-view of life in the Netherlands.
Or something like that.
Anyway. In Amsterdam we did some more video taping and lots of
shopping, like I already said above. Leif bought a particular
load of stuff, varying from T-shirts to perfume (yes, for his
mother). Kai bought some books I seem to recall ("Mostly
Harmless" for Jennifer, who is sortof his girlfriend but she
lives in the United States). I bought some CDs as well - the
Amsterdam CD shop Boudisque (one of the best in the Netherlands,
together with White Noise in Utrecht) had some cheap versions of
Rainbow's "Difficult to Cure" and Deep Purple's "Machinehead" so
I couldn't let them lie there. On top of that I bought Fates
Warning's excellent "Parallels".
I don't really like Amsterdam, by the way. There's so much scum
living there. We had barely gotten off the train and some guy
walked up to us trying to sell us cocaine. I think our free
approach to the drugs problem is pulling our country down the
drain. Of course some of you will say "Good. At least it will
create some height differences!" but I just hate the good-for-
nothing weaklings that rule our country. They're all so bloody
afraid to take impopular measures - or at least they seem afraid
to take measures that may cause the loud minority to start to
I will quit this. A real-time article should be light-hearted,
not a load of political bullshit.
This will be the last entry by me.
Sunday, January 3rd 1993
Back in a Norwegian universe, on the Atari Portfolio...
We are back already. Mainly due to Leif's limited budget, but
also because of us both desperately wanting some sleep (I think
Richard knows what I'm talking about!).
We had an extremely nice experience while we were out on the
town. If you ever happen to go out in Amsterdam, you should try
to locate the street in which the "Hardrock Café" is situated. In
that same street, a place simply called "Coffeeshop" is situated
(slogan: "Get down to it"). When we went in there we already had
in mind to have a decent drink instead of the all-too-usual
Heineken ("Heineken is like making love in a canoo: Fucking close
to water!"), and we asked about contents and names of the drinks,
and WE GOT ONE CALLED "KAMIKAZE" FOR FREE!!! I first couldn't
believe it, but the place was simply great; the atmosphere was
nice, the bartenders were really nice, and we thoroughly endorse
the place!!! And oh yeah, the "Hardrock Café" was quite nice, as
well. Poor little Gard; he just doesn't know what he is
Well, it's sort of bedtime now. It must be the earliest going to
bed on the whole Journey. Maybe not such a bad idea to have a
good night's sleep for once.
We had a nice time out on the town tonight, trying some really
nice drinks in a Coffeeshop. Kamikaze was the first one we got,
for free (what a nice bunch of lads they are indeed!). It was
really good in fact, not so strong (not exactly making you feel
like wanting to drop your dive-bomber-plane into the nearest
American warship!), but with a nice flavour of lime and lemon.
The second one up was ingeniously called Orgasm, and last was
Panama, the strongest of the lot, rounding off a nice (nice word
that; "nice"!) evening out on the town in Amsterdam.
See you tomorrow, good night!
Sleep infested the young Norwegians' minds, the Sandman entering
and doing a good job.
That was breakfast consumed. I've also had time to take a shower
in the non-Niagara falls water pressure that I'm afraid is common
to Holland. You almost have to put your face where the intended
water stream is supposed to be and see if you drown, just to make
sure water is really running! (?!?!?!, ED.)
Nice breakfast by the way, with some kind of opera playing in
the background (probably Guiseppe Verdi judging by the name of
Now we will go out in Amsterdam again, but this time just for
Yeah, the breakfast was fast, easy to consume and some hot
coffee cured my acheing throat pretty fast. Not completely
though, so I am still coughing every now and then. We are going
to have another stroll through Amsterdam in not too long a time,
in search of interesting sights and the occasional tourist trap.
This hotel we are staying at, Verdi, is owned and run by a very
oriental family called Kotero. We have so far met the mother and
two young daughters (maybe 14-15 and 18-19 years old,
respectively) here, and they all provide excellent service. This
is also a place I would warmly recommend. Their address is
Our budgets are running low, but we (at least I) have still
enough to get us/me some tax-free stuff at Schiphol. Poor Leif
(not life) who's almost totally out of cash. Life (not Leif)
I am desperately homesick. I long to get back to decent showers,
hot rooms, non-flat landscape, the snow, my family, my computer,
my Compact Disc collection, our HOUSE, my class and even my cats.
This journey was not like last year, when I lived away from my
family while attending school. I didn't really miss them then,
but I do now. I suppose Leif does so too, but he most probably
just longs to get back to all of his 12-year old girls...
(perhaps it's about time to stop teasing him like that; he is
actually 21 years old and as grown up as one might expect him to
Time to rest.
On the Atari ST again, somewhere more south...
I guess I'll write something anyway. The sheer thought that my
two Norwegian friends are still roaming in Amsterdam (where all
shops are closed) does not give me peace. Although I slept well
last night, I think I will not really sleep well until I know
they're back home.
Our place looks OK again. We've removed mountains of hair from
the edge of the toilet seat and the deepest bit of the shower's
floor, as well as a bitten-off nail from the guests' bed.
I am listening to "Difficult to Cure" now (the title song,
even), which incidentally turned out to be a CD of an exact
length of 42 minutes!
Outside it's still cold, and inside it's sortof warm. I guess
we'll have to watch our gas-and electricity bill now, for the
heating has toiled almost twice as much last week, and lights
have been on in our place almost permanently (especially in the
toilet, where the Norwegian seemed to be unable to find the 'off'
position of the switch). And I'm not even mentioning my audio
equipment that has sweated almost perpetually.
I will quit complaining now. I have an entire week ahead of me
that, apart from trying to get my biorhyhtm in order again, I
intend to use to master my virus killer version 5.7. I guess I
will curse plentily during that time.
The Portfolio returns on the scene of Schiphol Airport...
Our plane doesn't leave until 20:15 which means we have lots of
time left for executing various actions, e.g. writing on this
Earlier today we spent a couple of hours strolling around town,
glancing at lots of museums we couldn't afford to enter (The
torture and the sex museum were of special interest, but we were
saving our money to buy some booze at the airport, so tough
luck!). We would probably have spent lots more time doing that
hadn't it been for the fact that it was testicle-freezingly cold!
I haven't experienced such a case of serious chill since it was
15 below zero and blowing a storm back in my current home-town of
Vadsø. Right now we have just finished off writing a few
postcards, two of them for Richard. I have a feeling he will be
(As a matter of fact he was, ED.)
He probably will be surprised. Just as surprised as the love of
my life will be when she recieves the third card from my Journey.
Hey! I know you are tired of reading about her, but have mercy
with me; I won't meet her again until the summer of 1994! Sob!
In less than four hours we will (should) be airborn, though
strange things are known to happen, especially in situations like
We have had a lot of fun reading the January issue of "ST
Magazin - 68000er", which featured a lot of information about the
Falcon, even some about its Cookie Jar contents. This will
undoubtedly be interesting for Richard, and will therefore NOT be
There are people everywhere around us, and a lot of them have
stared dumbly at us while we have been typing these entries. Leif
even took some pictures of me pretending to be typing something.
This started some kind of trend, and seconds later an oriental-
looking family took some snapshots of themselves whilst in the
middle of a junkfood meal.
Leif just went off to see if we can check in downstairs. I am
still, as we both did a minute ago, sitting in a small restaurant
called "Touch Down" on the second floor. It is actually quite
nice, with pick-yourself-what-you-want-service (i.e. none), and a
clear look around you. We will check in as soon as possible, and
mail some postcards in the post office found somewhere behind the
He still hasn't returned, but I will stop now anyway.
I just returned from my search for someone willing to take our
luggage, so that we don't have to drag it around with us all the
time, but noone seemed like they particularly wanted to relieve
us of our burden. That's no problem really, since we still have
got more than three hours until the plane leaves. But it would
sort of have been nice (and definitely a lot less tiring!).
We seem like we might have a slight space problem on Leif's
Portfolio. It has no additional memory installed, which means
that we have no room for more than six kB more of this stuff, and
as we plan to write a bit onboard the plane as well, we will soon
have to stop.
I am currently listening to Whistler Courbois Whistler on my
portable CD-player. They are just brilliant, and I sure dislike
the fact that they're releasing a new album no more than 3
(three!) days after we leave Holland.
But enough of this crap.
Time to let the Portfolio rest.
We have now checked in, been to the post office with the three
post cards we wrote, bought 1 litre of Jägermeister each, bought
some light chocolate to feed our hungry stomachs and we are now
sitting at gate C11, awaiting boarding on flight SK 546 to Oslo,
which will commence at 19:45. In an hour we'll be in the air.
Crazy screams penetrate the hall as I realize that I'll soon be
back in good old Norway again. Guards look strangely at me
because of my CD-player, which is strapped beneath my jacket...
In other words, the ending of this real-time article is near.
When we land in Oslo, I will probably go by night bus to Øvre
Årdal, while Leif will spend the night at a mutual friend's house
(he's called Svein). He will then "port" the Portfolio stuff to
disk, and I will edit it and mail it to Richard. Later on, this
entire article will be found in both ST NEWS and "Scriba" ("S.
communis Responsum" issue 3, ED.).
Our plane just stopped next to the terminal (At 19:24), so I
guess in a minute the place will be crowded...
Time to shut off.
Now, the place is crowded!
No, it isn't! All kinds of people were just leaving the plane we
probably will be boarding in a few minutes. I hope they have
handled it with care!
The tax free shop didn't contain a single bottle of Plantiac!
Can you believe that? That's... that's eh... BLASPHEMY!!! That's
the word! Haven't the Dutch people got a tiny little bit of
pride? Can't they see the despair tearing two poor Norwegians
totally apart (wait a second, got to fetch a limb!) having to
leave without any divine fluid? Do they not see the quality of
this thing they are keeping away from the world? Well, the latter
is probably just the point; they wanna keep it for themselves,
Enough of that. Except for me going to cry myself to sleep the
coming nights because of the thought of not tasting more Plantiac
in a long time, everything is OK I guess. We will be boarding
soon, and we will write more onboard the plane, although it
probably won't be with the same passion as when we first came
I have been body searched! I have actually been truly body
searched! It was disappointingly not by a good-looking air-
waitress, not even a female at all, but in fact a black male!
Very exciting! That kind of thing always happens to me; sweet
little innocent me (I think I have already said that somewhere)!
I always seem to have some keys or coins or belt-buckle or
something making the security system go bananas. Until now that
has only meant removing items one by one and then going through
once more, but this time I actually was body-searched! If I get
nightmares after this, I'll sue them!
Fornebu Airport, Oslo, Norway
We're safely on firm ground again! It's always a relieving
feeling when you feel the wheels touching soil again. Now, we're
waiting for our luggage, which is coming right now. Gotta run!
Past customs! Oh, here comes transport. Will write more later!
Monday, January 4th 1993 - in Oslo
I was going to write lots more both on the plane and on Fornebu,
but the latter was hindered by simple lack of time (I have never
experienced so little waiting after landing!) and the former by a
hyper-active air-waitress trying to make us believe some shit
about the Portfolio messing up the plane's navigational system.
My tiny little innocent Portfolio! It probably doesn't radiate
anything more than would be absorbed by the seat in front of us,
and that should actually suffice to guide us to Heathrow instead
of Oslo or something. I don't think so, but she wouldn't
Kai didn't reach his bus last night by the way. He was three
minutes too late! Well, that only means a night on the couch for
him, cause it's his turn! (And he will have to wait another day
before the reunion with his charming sisters!). He will be going
early tomorrow morning (I'm not leaving until 15:10, so I'm
sleeeeping tomorrow (or today, actually)), so sadly he won't be
writing anything more on this article. That leaves you with yours
truly who will probably guide you all the way to Vadsø which, if
I haven't mentioned it before, is located approximately 2500
kilometres north of Oslo, way above the polar circle.
We read some newspapers on the plane (Heaven-sent Norwegian
newspapers we hadn't read for over a week!) telling us about some
tornado having wrecked almost half my home town. Maybe a sight
worse than Utrecht after New Year's Eve will greet me there. The
papers almost made me expect a kind of war zone or something! I
certainly hope my car is still in working condition, otherwise I
think I will become slightly mad!
It's getting late, so although I'm able to sleep for a long time
tomorrow (which still is actually today. I'm not going to sleep
that long!) I think I will simply say 'good night' now.
Høybuktmoen Airport, Kirkenes, Norway
Delays, delays and further delays. Oh, how I hate them! The
plane out from Oslo was already half an hour late, and then we
were delayed an hour further in Tromsø, and now last I have to
wait another hour here in Kirkenes for a 10-minute flight across
the fjord to Vadsø. Flying sucks sometimes! I didn't have time to
write anything earlier today, basically because I was asleep for
too long. Kai woke me up around 8.30 to say goodbye, and I think
I managed to give him a half-unconscious wave of my hand before I
promptly reentered dreamland.
After getting up at around 11.30 Svein and I went to downtown
Oslo to do some shopping. Svein had managed to sell my Philips
monitor (I have sold all my computer equipment to make space for
the Falcon!) and I was rich again (?). Svein, by the way, is an
outstanding person, and both me and Kai are very grateful to him
for driving us here and there and lending us beds and feeding us,
etc. - thank you!
Now I'm tired of waiting and the most precious item in my life
right now is my bed! Or, rather, the memory of it! I'm actually a
bit homesick, although I only have my one-room apartment (I do at
least have a decent shower!) to look forward to (and all my 12-
year-old girlfriends, of course!). Hopefully I will be there
At Home in Vadsø (er...Norway, of course)
Home at last!
Status here after the tornado isn't that bad after all. I had a
friend pick me up at the airport, and he told me that the tornado
had been bad with houses shaking and some roofs leaving their
buildings behind, but nothing as bad as they tried to put it in
the papers. We are sort of used to this kind of weather up here!
My car was even still standing exactly where I put it when I
left. The only problem being that it won't start. Flat battery!
Nice welcome! This means that I will have to get up early
tomorrow and try to catch a bus for work. Just what I needed!
This will probably be my last entry into this article, and
probably also the last entry overall (that's what you thought,
ED.). I hope you have all enjoyed reading about our Journey, and
I would like to say to you all that you should never hesitate
when considering to travel somewhere. It may be expensive, but
just do it (sponsored by NIKE)! Travelling is always such an
experience that it is almost worth anything, and they make great
memories! I will never forget our Journey for as long as I care
to be active on this planet. Think about that the next time you
buy all those fancy clothes, new CDs, games, books and so on.
Instead of all those soon-forgettable items you could consider
something that will forever live on in your memory. Think about
That's enough morale for now, and this is good-bye!
Wednesday, January 27th 1993, Øvre Årdal, Norway (yeah sure)
This is sortof an epilogue, really, written on a lonely but
faithful Atari ST owned by Kai...
Finally. That's all I can say. It really took Leif a heck of a
long time to get this prose to me, with the result that
everything following it will also be delayed - ST NEWS Volume 8
Issue 1, SCR Issue 2.1, our receiving the Nobel literature prize
You might wonder why I have let three weeks go by before writing
anything else... Three reasons I shall give you: 1) This is by
now the longest lasting real-time article to ever be created,
spanning an entire month! (Thus turning it into a record article,
in spite of many negative predictions!), 2) I didn't want to
write anything until I had received the things Leif wrote after I
left him half unconscious in Oslo, and 3) I was exhausted and, as
you will read further down, not feeling quite well...
But let me begin the aftermath with a short resumé of what my
bus journey home was like on the morning of Monday, January
Yes! A flashback! The chronological sequence of this is now
The bus left the NorWay bus terminal at 09:20, five minutes
delayed. I had three hundred and thirty boring minutes ahead of
me then, along those roads I had gone along so many times
already. Even though the nature all around the road is
magnificent most of the way, 6½ hours is a nuisance if you're
sitting in the same seat all the time. So I used my portable CD-
player to get into a good mood. Because of the rather nice
weather with occasional sun, the bus was terribly over-heated,
and became more and more uncomfortable. A steadily growing
headache and an already strong cold didn't make things better.
Queensrÿche's "Operation Mindcrime" was about the only thing that
made me get through the first half of the trip. At 12:45 there
was a thirty-minute stop in Fagernes, and I used the opportunity
to buy fresh batteries to last home.
The last half of the ride I listened thrice to WCW's "Whistler
Courbois Whistler". Though it became rather monotonous after the
second run, I really loved it! The memories of Christmas '91 came
to me because of the song called "Fata Morgana", along with the
memories of two happy evenings I spent in the company of the one
who was to conquer my heart, but who is now separated from my by
approximately seven thousand kilometres. Life sucks.
But I made it home. At 15:30 the bus was facing the scaring
descent down the mountainside of Årdal - a cliff with a natural
angle of very nearly 80 degrees into which a road has been carved
and shaped during the last century. Nature never meant roads to
be built there. I changed the CD playing from WCW to Maurice
Ravel's "Boléro". It lasts for approximately fifteen minutes,
about the same amount of time as the descent, and its volume and
tension builds up just like mine whenever I go up or down that
And at 15:45 I "landed" in Øvre Årdal, over-heated,
uncomfortable, bored and slightly happy. A journey which had
given an ever-lasting impression on me had come to an end, and I
was at home. Or rather, at the place I am unfortunately forced to
call home. Sigh.
Having missed the late bus the day before, I missed a day at
school, and believe it or not, I was actually eager to get back
there! I knew my class would be eager to hear about my
impressions and experiences!
Just how wrong can one be? During the five hours I spent at
school the following day, only one person even cared to remember
I'd been abroad without me mentioning it first, and that person
was not one of my classmates. That just went to give me another
bad impression of the society of this damned place (note: Damned,
not damn!)! With any luck, I won't be here the next school year.
But where was I? I spent five hours only at school, yes. I left
at 12:40 because I felt bad. The cold I had caught due to me
being unprepared for the intense cold of the Netherlands
(actually it hadn't been colder than one a two degrees below zero
(OK, perhaps three) and I can't imagine Norway being any warmer
this time of year, ED.) had blossomed, my throath was sore, and
my voice was nearly gone. I went home, made a cup of tea, fetched
the mail (nothing for me, as usual), and went to bed. The cold
was a souvenir I'd rather have been without! It lasted for well
over a week, stealing another two days of school from me!
There is not much more to tell. I DID manage to find a present
for the one of my heart, in spite of time and money pressure, and
I have added a little extra something to it...
I have begun writing an "Encyclopaedia Hollandica", which should
be found in an article close to this one, presuming I ever finish
Leif has made a summary of 42 things we did in Holland (which
you should also find somewhere nearby, ED.).
I've done some correspondence I was supposed to do before
Richard hasn't sent me a copy of the Home Vid' yet.
As far as I'm concerned, this is the end of the article. Time to
* THE END *
The text of the articles is identical to the originals like they appeared in old ST NEWS issues. Please take into consideration that the author(s) was (were) a lot younger and less responsible back then. So bad jokes, bad English, youthful arrogance, insults, bravura, over-crediting and tastelessness should be taken with at least a grain of salt. Any contact and/or payment information, as well as deadlines/release dates of any kind should be regarded as outdated. Due to the fact that these pages are not actually contained in an Atari executable here, references to scroll texts, featured demo screens and hidden articles may also be irrelevant.