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© Dave 'Spaz of TLB' Moss

SUPPORT               The  mailing of advertising  literature  to
                      customers who have returned a  registration
                      card.

UPGRADED & IMPROVED   Didn't work the second time.

MEMORY RESIDENT       Ready at the press of a key to disable  any
                      current running program.

MULTITASKING          A  clever method of simultaniously  slowing
                      down  the  multitude of  computer  programs
                      that insist on running too fast.

ENCRYPTION            A  powerful algorithmic encoding  technique
                      employed   in  the  creation  of   computer
                      manuals.

RISC                  The  gamble  that a computer  not  directly
                      compatible with nothing else on the  planet
                      mat  actually have decent software  written
                      for it someday.

CD-ROM                An  optical device with storage  sufficient
                      to  hold billions of  predictions  claiming
                      that it will revolutionize the  information
                      industry.

HARD DISK             A  device that allows users to delete  vast
                      quantities  of  data with  simple  mnemonic
                      commands.

NETWORK               An  electonic means of allowing  more  than
                      one person at a time to corrupt,  trash  or
                      otherwise cause permanent damage to  useful
                      information.

INTEGRATED SOFTWARE   A  single  product  that  deftly   performs
                      hundreds of functions the user never  needs
                      and  awkwardly performs the half  dozen  he
                      uses constantly.

                                       Provided by Roy McPartland


                    THOSE FLAMING TOS ERRORS
                 - A Near Complete List of 'Em -
             compiled and welcomed by Roy McPartland

 Once  apon a time there was a computer.   Like all pleasant  and
nice computers it came with leads,  disks,  wires,  and a manual.
But  one  day an evil spirit cursed the  computer,  removing  all
traces of explanation for the computer's error messages from  its
manual.  Woe was the owner who was presented with the legend "TOS
Error  #35".   Something had to be done.   The task fell  on  the
computer's  support  magazines to destroy  the  curse.   Only  by
listing  the  meanings  of the error codes could  the  owners  be
released from their torment.
 ST NEWS is one such warrior.

 Enough  of that,  let me explain the reasons for  compiling  the
list.   My brother recently bought a STE for use during his  poly
course.   Naturally he came to me,  an ST owner for three  years,
when  things started to go wrong.   The disks he was  using  were
knackered.   Of course he didn't know this because all his ST was
displaying was 'TOS Error #35'.   He'd been looking in his manual
for some sort of explanation,  but as all ST owners know this  is
the last place to look.   Then one of my own disks caused my  STE
to  produce the warning 'TOS Error #6'.   I was  baffled.   After
much searching through my collection of mags I finally found  out
what the computer was trying to tell me - my disk was corrupt.

 So for all users of the ST here's that list.

#   Description                        Roy's Alternative Answer
-----------------------------------------------------------------
1...General Error
2...Drive not ready
3...Unknown command
4...CRC error - disk checksum wrong    Knackered Bootsector
5...Bad request
6...Seek error - track not found       Dodgy disk, corrupted?
7...Unknonn media - bootsector wrong   Knackered totally
8...Sector not found                   Corrupt or dodgy disk
9...Out of paper                       Blame that puppy...
10..Write fault                        Drive needs repairing?
11..Read fault                         As above, or corrupt disk
12..General error 12                   Eh?
13..Disk write protected               Try moving the tab
14..Media change detected              Wrong disk put in drive
15..Unknow device
16..Bad sector (verify)                More dodgy disks
17..Insert other disk (request)
18 - 31..?
32..Invalid function number
33..File not found                     Corrupt file or wrong disk
34..Path not found                     Wrong disk?
35..Too many open files                Corrupt disk or program
36..Access denied                      Protected file
37..Invalid handle                     Turn the other next time!
38..?
39..Out of memory                      Try using less ACCs
40..Invalid memory block address       It  lives above  the  shop
                                       now
41 - 45..?
46..Invalid drive specification        Should  have  been   crazy
                                       paving
47 + 48..?
49..No more files                      No more flies, in reality
50 - 63..?
64..GEMDOS range error - seek wrong?   Too  technical  to   worry
                                       about
65..GEMDOS internal error
66..Invalid executable file format     Don't      mess       with
                                       DESKTOP.INF
67..Memory block growth failure        My brain hurts

 NB/ Error 35 could also be caused by the 40 folders bug found in
machines with a early version of TOS.

 That's it, don't say I never do anything for you! 

Disclaimer
The text of the articles is identical to the originals like they appeared in old ST NEWS issues. Please take into consideration that the author(s) was (were) a lot younger and less responsible back then. So bad jokes, bad English, youthful arrogance, insults, bravura, over-crediting and tastelessness should be taken with at least a grain of salt. Any contact and/or payment information, as well as deadlines/release dates of any kind should be regarded as outdated. Due to the fact that these pages are not actually contained in an Atari executable here, references to scroll texts, featured demo screens and hidden articles may also be irrelevant.