"I'm sorry. If you were right I'd agree with you."
Robin Williams, "Awakenings"
THE ULTIMATE "ST NEWS" REFERENCE GUIDE
Part 2 - "Earth" to "Klaxos Nine"
Earth. Mostly Harmless.
Empty Trashcan With Something In It, the. Somewhere in late 1988
and early 1989, reading Douglas >Adams' books made the ST NEWS
writers ever more crazy. And so it happened that, one day,
various occurrences of the Extollers of the Empty Trashcan With
Something In It came to life, spiritually entering the editorial
rooms, chanting slogans, and flapping their >sandals. Obviously
inspired by Hare Krishna and Zen followers, these articles just
served to take the mickey out of these reli-nuts. The ST NEWS
'reli-nut issue' was Volume 4 Issue 3.
Enchanted Land. Game programmed by Nic of >TCB for >Thalion and
finished autumn 1990. It was the first and last Atari game to
feature 50 Hz (1 vertical blank) arcade action on a fully sync-
scrolling screen in all directions.
'Two little known facts of this game are the following. Nic
thought of the name of the leading character, Khurgan. This was
inspired by the baddy in "Highlander". And I thought up the name
of the game, which was inspired by the song of the same name by
Estefan, Gloria. (b. 1 Sep. 1957) Rather lovely singer who was
the model for one of the >Ambulor Eight nurses working in the
>Hospital for the Very Very Splattered who re-appeared in a
handful of Cronos >Warchild stories. Between the nurse and Cronos
there appeared to be a strangely platonic relationship that, for
the most part, Warchild was completely unaware of.
'I don't know why I picked Gloria Estefan, really. I am not a
fan or anything, but she's pretty, so that's why it happened, I
suppose. Today I'd probably pick Mariah Carey or Björk or
Eureka Event of Excellence. Momentously pretentious event
involving a lot of fireworks, 400 singers, some guests artists
and >Vangelis, taking place on 18 June 1991. All of it, with the
exception of some keyboard fills and, possibly, the choire, was
playbacked. Still, it looked really impressive. A visit to this
occasion by the ST NEWS editorial staff and various members of
the >Quartermass Xperiment was chronicled in a >real-time article
in ST NEWS Volume 6 Issue 2.
European Demos. Two-disk megademo, one of the two to be released
at the >STNICCC in 1990, together with >"Syntax Terror". Made by
the Overlanders, who actually pronounced it as "European Demos".
Well, at least they got the plural right, but that was probably
because they had Dogue de Mauve, English expert, among their
Evelien. Stefan's first real girlfriend, back in the very early
years of ST NEWS. We're talking early 1988 here, around the time
when >TEX visited >ST Club Eindhoven and the first >Real-time
article was written.
Excel Software. English company of Stockport, Cheshire, set up by
Niall >McKiernon. It primarily distributed Public Domain software
in the UK. After Richard had written an article about viruses
that got published in the December 1988 issue of >"Page 6", Niall
contacted him for a distribution deal on what was then known as
the "Virus Destruction Utility". Little more than half a year
later, he got Richard a deal with >CRL.
Extravagant English. A group of ST NEWS readers in Chorley,
England. They wrote some very interestingly warped letters to
Stefan and Richard, and a short period of intense correspondence
followed. Ash Chadwick was the one who had the ST and wrote some
simple but hilarious demos. He later entertained the editorial
staff by writing lengthy accounts of autopsies, which he had to
assist with for his work. He has a sister called Mel >Chadwick.
'The Extravagant English were very much like the >Nutty
Norwegians, only rather more Extravagant and less Nutty. We'd
always hoped for Grotesque Germans, Awesome Australians and
Berzerked Belgians, but somehow they never came. Closest we came
was an Amazing Austrian (hi Marinos!).' (Richard)
Faber, Gerard. A.k.a. Fabersoft, which is, granted, a bit of a
silly name. He co-conspired with the creation of ST NEWS
somewhere in the 1986-1987 timespan. He then switched to buy an
>Amiga with his friend Jos >Schilders. They claimed to be very
happy with their Amigas.
FaST Club. Excellent Atari club in Nottingham, England, lead by
Paul Glover. They release a magazine called "ST Applications",
and faithfully support Atari ST and Falcon formats. Ever since
original UK ST NEWS distributor "Page 6 / New Atari User" started
to devote less attention to 16-bit Atari stuff and less to 8-bit,
"Fast Club" became the original ST NEWS distributor.
F.A.S.T.E.R. Commercial disk magazine from Canada which started
around autumn of 1986, within months after ST NEWS, and ended
with Volume 2 Issue 4, around the summer of 1987. Right from the
start it used a GEM-based user interface with a (medium res)
picture. This was what eventually caused ST NEWS to start using
its own user interface (though not originally quite such a good
one) starting with the first 1987 issue, Volume 2 Issue 1.
'It was the magazine we looked up to, and certainly the best of
its time by a long shot. A year or so later, a magazine wrote a
review of ST NEWS in which it claimed we had gotten better than
"F.A.S.T.E.R.", which was at the time the biggest compliment we
could get.' (Richard)
Fax Wars, the. A friendly war that included a lot of swearing and
pictures of Lost People slaughtering Gremlbears, and vice versa.
It all happened one day in the late summer of 1990, through fax,
between a number in Sweden and the number of the Thalion offices
in Germany. Thalion's managing director wasn't very happy the
next day, when he noticed how often fax messages had been sent.
This eventually accumulated in a special 'slaughter screen' in
the >TLB megademo, "Ooh Crikey Wot a Scorcher".
Flash Cracking Group (FCG). Sortof semi-illegal German crew of
which the >Amazing Cracking Conspiracy became a member after them
switching to the Atari ST. It only lasted for a few months, after
which they joined the >Desaster Area. All this joining and stuff
was basically a name thing and never amounted to any serious co-
operation. FCG was already pretty 'famous' on the Commodore 64.
Flying Shark. Game released by Firebird in the late eighties.
Reviewing this game, Stefan wrote his first ever 'introductory
novel', which was a particularly fine one even though it ended in
the death of the protagonist.
Froggies over the Fence. Last of the great megademos, released 29
September 1993 on 3 double-sided disks, originally planned for
September 1992. Richard wrote the scroll message of the "reset
screen", which was arguably the longest scroller ever written in
the history of Atari demo coding with a length of almost 170,000
bytes. Unfortunately, the demo allowed the reader to page up and
down through it, and it had become readable as a screen-filling
story instead of a simple horizontal scrolling line. It was
released by a bunch of French crews, lead by the >Overlanders.
Furyo. The Man With The Smelliest Feet In The Universe. Known to
send worn socks to members of varies other crews, such as Tim of
>TLB and Tyrem of The Respectables. His real name is Fabrice
Odero, and he lives in the south of France somewhere.
Gehrmann, Holger. First of the Atari ST sound programmers who
were any good. He made several games for his company, Reline
software, titles of which include "Extensor" and "Space Port".
"Extensor" was a monochrome "Tron" type of game, not too good but
with really great music that was the first to use "twin-tone
mode" on the Atari YM 2149 sound chip. "Space Port" was a
Commodore 64 "Fort Apocalypse" clone, though not quite as
playable. Holger made his music available for use in a project
called >"Synth Sample V", including one original composition.
GenST. The assembler of choice, part of "DevPac ST", for Stefan.
Using this, he wrote all the assembler code for ST NEWS and his
contributions to the >TLB demos.
Gently, Dirk. Character in Douglas >Adams' books "Dirk Gently's
Holistic Detective Agency" (1987) and "The Long Dark Teatime of
the Soul" (1988). Marvelously witty and very, very weird.
'Needless to say, both Stefan and me consumed these books
avidly. I recently read the first of the two again and was once
again inspired and awed and its weirdness. Now I come to think of
it, I think the Electric Monk might have been the catalyst for
all the general nuttyness and crazitude that entered ST NEWS
around the end of 1988, which is when we actually got into these
GfA Basic. A very powerful and versatile BASIC dialect for the
ST, written by Frank Ostrowski and marketed by GfA Systemtechnik,
Germany. Used by Stefan and Richard to write most of the ST NEWS
code, and by Richard to produce all of his other programs. Using
Pascal-like procedures and fast 100% machine code, it was
challenged only by "Omikron Basic", which came on the market too
late. Especially through use of "GfA Flydials" by Gregor
Duchalski, such programs as "Hiscore Terminal Utility", "Backup
Destruction Utility" and >"Ultimate Virus Killer" came by their
slick GEM interface using windows and custom dialogs.
Glenlivet. After reading "Magic Kingdom for Sale (Sold)" by Terry
Brooks - in which the protagonist took only a few bottles of
Glenlivet from the real world to the imaginary world - Stefan
decided to try this drink. The smooth and mellow 12 year old
single malt Scotch whisky went down well and Stefan introduced it
to his friend Niklas >Malqvist in Sweden. Both became big fans of
the drink and many, many bottles were consumed during Nik's
monthly visits to Stefan during the >CD-I years.
Googlogulpax (also spelled GOOGOGULPEX). Fictional planet from
which uncannily naked, incredibly long-limbed creatures descend
to earth to hand >"Multiface" cartridges to unsuspecting ST NEWS
editorial staff members. Creatures from this planet occurred
twice in the 10 years ST NEWS lasted, and are known to have taken
grave insult to the term "??½????¬¿?÷!" This string of seemingly
pointless characters was 'accidentally' typed in when Stefan was
writing and Richard put on >Sodom's "Live Without Sense" rather
too loudly. Although meaningless to most sentient beings, in
Googlogulpaxian it means "Go and stick a Brussels sprout up your
anal muscle". The planet has an economy that largely thrives on
the growing of Brussels Sprouts (come on now, you didn't believe
there was enough space in Brussels to grow them all, did you?).
As a matter of fact, they have at least 41 different words for
"sprout", though only one word for "sphincter".
Gray Matter. The company that lured Stefan away from >SPC, and
onto the North American continent. Located in Toronto, Ontario,
>Canada, it creates games for the Sony Playstation, the Sega
Saturn, the 3DO M2 and PC. The company is headed by author of the
8-bit version of the immortal game "Boulderdash", Chris Gray. The
company is momentarily involved in writing a PC/Playstation
version of "The Crow City of Angels", which will supposedly be
the most gory and violent game of all times.
Greco, Gerardo. First Italian distributor of ST NEWS, later
replaced by Federico Bicini. Gerardo wrote some interesting
stuff, such as a review of the impressive "ADAP Sound Rack"
(early in Volume 2) and an interview with Shiraz Shivji, the man
who according to popular legend designed both the >Commodore 64
and Atari ST on his kitchen table.
Greek Goddess. Title, lovingly bestowed on the waitress in a
Greek restaurant (real name Agapi) that was visited by Stefan and
Richard after the "HCC Dagen" (a computer fair) in autumn of
1988. They fell instantly, romantically and head-over-heels in
love with her for a period that lasted approximately 12 euphoric
hours into which they committed to paper a rather over-the-top
and quite self-indulgent piece about her that eventually made it
into ST NEWS Volume 3 Issue 7, which they also decided they'd
dedicate to her.
'In March 1989, we eventually had dinner at that particular
restaurant, "Zorba the Greek", again. We had a printed-out
version of the story with us. Although Agapi wasn't there that
particular evening, we gave it to a colleague that said he'd hand
it on. Agapi no longer works there now. As a matter of fact, a
few years ago the name changed to "Mr. Jack's" and it's now a
rather cramped and cheap Italian/Greek restaurant. I go there
regularly because it's so cheap. They sell a gorgeous but
culinarily barbarian "giros pizza". I always add gorgonzola
cheese sauce.' (Richard)
Guatemala. A small country in Middle America. Stefan went here in
1992, visiting his girlfriend at the time, >Ivette.
Gütersloh. Town about 50 kilometres east of the German
Ruhrgebiet, suffering from a chronic lack of nightlife. It was
the town where >Thalion Software was located and, thus, the place
where Richard lived for approximately 18 months from October 1988
to March 1991.
'The only good times I had there were the Christmas markets.
They used to sell great baked mushrooms then. Gütersloh had no
nightlife whatsoever, which was horrible. We'd go to the cinema
regularly, though, but those were dubbed in German. Good thing
was that they didn't have breaks in the middle of the film. We
spent our evenings working late, writing, coding, or watching
videos. We used to live in the old Thalion office, where there
weren't any showers, so we just went to the swimming pool really
early in the morning to shower ourselves. We spent our time their
wetting old German women's hair which they tried very much to
keep dry.' (Richard)
Häagen-Dazs. After first tasting this in the USA, Stefan became
immediately hooked. Certainly the king of ice creams, and still
ruling. Much to Stefan's despair, it was unavailable in Holland
for years. He had to get his fixes while on holiday in the States
or visiting his sister in the UK. When it was finally introduced
to Holland, Stefan frequently used to make 20 minute detours
while driving home from work to pick up a tub. Now, living in
Canada, the stuff is available to him in every supermarket and
gas station, a true heaven. Be assured that his freezer always
contains at least one tub.
Hackbear, Lord (LHB). Honorary title, "Ripper of the Decade",
bestowed upon Torbjørn >Ose after having hacked the copy
protection off the "Thalion Sound Demo". The decade in question
is that of the 80's, and Torbjørn also deserved this title
because he'd ripped the music from every single issue of ST NEWS
up to that moment, and he'd written a special utility to extract
and decompress the ST NEWS articles to find the hidden ones. The
lengths to which he'd go were quite amazing. At the same time
this title was bestowed on Torbjørn, Karl-Anders Øygard (a.k.a.
Wizzcat of Delta Force) got named his apprentice. The ST NEWS
editorial staff was greatly pleased when Torbjørn adapted this
name as his new computer scene nickname and even, much later,
joined Delta Force under this monicker.
Hamsters. Small nocturnal rodents that gather food and nesting
materials using their pouch-like cheeks. Very cute and cuddly,
they make good pets and their endless curiosity and activity make
them a great source of entertainment. A funny thing is that many
people see hamster-keeping as childish and immature yet every one
of the critics melted when confronted with the small balls of fur
and were stricken by their cute and friendly appearance. Richard
and Stefan have had quite a few, including >Pipi, >Cronos,
Malmpje, >Chi-Chi, >Nephilim, >Natanga and >Mr. Pink (and that is
just during the ST NEWS years, i.e. from summer 1986).
Hatlemark, Ronny. Erstwhile ST NEWS distributor in Norway and
host to the >"Norway Quest" (1989-1990), later 'just' good friend
after he decided to sell his Atari and embrace the world of PCs
and compatibles and once more (co-)host to a smaller "Norway
Quest" in the summer of 1993. He was the centrepoint of the
>Nutty Norwegians. It wasn't until the general ST NEWS craziness
involving Douglas Adams, reli-nuts and general mayhemmatic
absurdity that he really showed himself from his zany side,
bringing into the play his friends Gard >Abrahamsen, Frøystein
>Hustadnes and Torbjørn >Ose. During the first "Norway Quest" he
started seeing Anne-Grete Masdal, with whom he got a daughter,
Jeanette (b. 13 June 1992). Not long after the second Norway
Quest (summer 1993), they unfortunately broke up.
'I still remember the first thing he sent to me. It was a
picture postcard of the place where he lived, Ørsta, at the end
of a fjord and draped on a mountain. It had a small circle around
a house, with an arrow which said "I live here". He became the
official Norwegian ST NEWS distributor but I never really heard
anything from him for about a year or so. Until he discovered
that we were crazy, that is, and he really joined our frayed
edges of insanity.' (Richard)
Hawking, Stephen. Brilliant British scientist suffering from ALS
Lou Gehrig's Syndrome, a fate shared by wonder-guitarist Jason
>Becker. Hawking has written several excellent books, one of
which - "A Brief History of Time" (1988) - was read by the ST
NEWS editorial staff.
'A book like that cannot help but change the reader for the rest
of his life. Although it's quite difficult, Hawking goes through
lengths to try and make it understandable. It really changes some
of the basic aspects of life, just to know some of the stuff he
knows. He is the Einstein of our time. He's written another
'popularly' scientific book last year or so, but I forgot its
Headache Obliteration Device. Loving nickname applied to the
>Aiwa walkmen, caused by their sheer ability to obliterate
headaches by inserting the earphones and pressing "PLAY".
Although never described as such, they are also "Hangover
Headbanging. An act of repeatedly moving back and forth (or
circularly around) of one's head, preferably to heavy metal
music. At times it's done with towels on heads, which had a
rather hilarious effect when performed on a video like, say, the
>"ST News Home Vid'".
Helmond. Town in the southern part of the Netherlands, about 15
km. east of Eindhoven, where Richard lived from his birth in
1967 up to his departure from home in the summer of 1988.
'A pretty OK place, though I'd prefer never to have to live
there again. It's turned very criminal - rating second after the
really big cities such as Amsterdam - and has changed quite a bit
since I left. I don't feel at home there any more.' (Richard)
Hidden Articles. Ever since ST NEWS Volume 4 Issue 2, with the
exception of Volume 10 Issue 2, one or more articles in ST NEWS
have been 'hidden'. This usually entailed that some kind of thing
had to be performed by the reader (such as pressing a particular
key combination, or typing a particular word or number when in
menu mode) in order to gain access to articles reckoned not fit
for normal exposure. Usually, these featured raunchy song lyrics
or rather "American Psycho" type horrors, or dirty bits lifted
off some deranged Usenet News group, or segments from fake
>'real-time' articles. Most of the time, though, they feature
articles that are funny in a harmless way, but hidden because
they were taken from another source. The first couple of ST NEWS
issues with hidden articles had separately written segments of
the program to cope with them, but there have been standard
routines in them for at least three years now. They can handle
all 'hidden article event types' needed. Lord >HackBear is known
to have ripped hidden articles using a custom ST NEWS decrunching
tool. One wonders why he did it.
'I always thought that too many disk magazines were made up for
too far an extent - or even almost solely - of 'humour' articles
lifted off some Internet site or BBS. When we'd come across one
of these that was simply irressistably funny, we'd use them as
hidden articles. That way we could at least have the outward
impression that we were doing all of ST NEWS just about
ourselves. We never used more than 5% of all stuff as hidden
articles, I think.' (Richard)
Hippel, Jochen. (b. 14 October 1972) A.k.a. Mad Max of >TEX. One
of the most brilliant Atari music programmers, if not because of
his composition skills. He started converted Rob >Hubbard tunes
from the >Commodore 64 for the first few TEX demos, which
eventually culminated in the astounding >"B.I.G. Demo", released
in early 1988. For quite a few issues, starting with ST NEWS
Volume 2 Issue 5, he's supplied the music. With the release of
Volume 5 Issue 2, the "Mega Apocalypse" soundtrack was clumsily
prepared. Obviously, it was only a burden to him to supply more
music. He has not been heard of since in the context of ST NEWS.
Latest rumours go around saying that he's become a car repairman.
Table: Music in ST NEWS
Issue: Title: Programmed by: Origin:
2.1 Popcorn ? ?
2.5 Monty on the Run Mad Max Rob Hubbard
2.6 Chimera Mad Max Rob Hubbard
2.7 Warhawk Mad Max Rob Hubbard
2.8 Ace II Mad Max Rob Hubbard
3.1 W.A.R. Mad Max Rob Hubbard
3.2 Thrust Mad Max Rob Hubbard
3.3 International Karate + Mad Max Rob Hubbard
3.4 BMX Simulator II Mad Max D. Whittaker
3.5 Wiz Mad Max Rob Hubbard
3.6 I, Ball Mad Max Rob Hubbard
3.7 Balloon Challenge Mad Max Rob Hubbard
3.C Phantoms of the Ast. Mad Max Rob Hubbard
4.1 Auf Wiedersehen Monty Mad Max Rob Hubbard
4.2 Zoolook Mad Max Rob Hubbard
4.3 Comic Bakery Mad Max Martin Galway
4.4 Chris Hülsbeck Remix Mad Max Chris Hülsbeck
Knuckle Buster Mad Max Rob Hubbard
Galway Remix Mad Max Martin Galway
Panther David Whittaker D. Whittaker
5.1 Scoop Mad Max Jeroen Tel
F.C Knuckle Buster Mad Max Rob Hubbard
5.2 Mega Apocalypse Mad Max Hubbard
6.1 Malleus Malliforicum The Mind The Mind
6.2 Repatriated Nuclear Ululation
The Mind The Mind
7.1 Freddy's Revenge The Mind The Mind
7.2 Judgment Day Big Alec Big Alec
7.3 Tubular Bells Remix Big Alec Big Alec
8.1 A Case for Two Big Alec Big Alec
8.2 In Visible Touch Big Alec Big Alec
9.1 Punish Your Machine Big Alec Big Alec
9.2 Bangkok Knights Loader Big Alec Matt Gray
9.3 Reality Big Alec Big Alec
10.1 Crystal Clear Big Alec Big Alec
10.2 Stand By Big Alec Big Alec
11.1 Hyperspace Melancholy Big Alec Big Alec
x.C = Compendium; F.C = Final Compendium
Hold button. Thing on the >Aiwa walkmen owned by both members of
the ST NEWS editorial staff. When in the "on" position, it makes
sure no key is accidentally depressed. When in the "on" position,
it also makes sure any intended action is not actually executed,
such as "record" when in one room together with the X-Cops, doing
'I was pretty pissed off at my own stupidity.' (Richard)
Holst, Kai. (b. 20 Aug. 1974) One of the two members (with Leif
Einar Claus, lover of 12-year-old-girls and dweller of the arctic
circle) of the New >Nutty Norwegians. He got introduced to ST
NEWS rather late, so he had missed all the old goings-on. Like
Richard, he was also the author of a virus killer program,
"Antidote" ('practise safe hex, use "Antidote"!'). Richard and
>Miranda visited him (as well as Ronny >Hatlemark) in the summer
of 1993. His mother, like that of Ronny, is a great and copious
cook. Kai is an unsurpassed knower of old ST NEWS trivia.
Home Vid'. Quite a few of these have been made throughout the
history of ST NEWS. The first, of course, was the May 1989 >"ST
NEWS Home Vid'". Later followed the December 1990 >"ST NEWS
International Christmas Coding Convention Vid'" (of which over 40
copies were made and sent out), the summer 1991 (?) "QX Home Vid'
- Looking For Inspiration" and the Yuletide 1992/1993 "The Vid'
We Found No Name For". They are sometimes referred to as CVTs, or
Crazy Video Tapes.
'The term "home vid'", with the trendy apostrophe at the end,
was inspired by the "Cliff 'Em All" Metallica home vid'. The
stuff we did was pretty much like it - the quality ain't that
happenin', but it's the atmosphere that counts.' (Richard)
Honey. Bees' shit. Despite the fact that it comes from a
arthropod's arsehole, it tastes remarkably sweet. >Ants have an
obsession with it.
Hospital for the Very Very Splattered. A kind of sanitorium for
suicidals located on >Ambulor Eight. Nurses - who are known to
bear uncanny resemblance to Gloria >Estefan in at least one or
two recorded cases - walk around with "Ambulor Eight Hospital For
The Very Very Splattered" printed on the back of their uniforms
in blood-red, dripping writing most commonly found in B-horror
House, My. A small adventure game written in "GfA Basic" used to
illustrate Stefan's first programming article for ST NEWS, "How
to Write Your Own Adventures" (in ST NEWS Volume 1 Issue 6,
November 1986). Based on one of his first adventures written way
back for the Commodore VIC 20 after getting an 8K RAM expansion
Hubbard, Rob. Amazingly talented music programmer and, even more
so, composer. Made a name on the Commodore 64 by writing a large
amount of excellent musical pieces for games, such as "Monty on
the Run", "Knuckle Buster" and "Master of Magic". He first
appeared on the Atari platform in 1987 through the music of a
Microdeal game called "Goldrunner" (which was actually a three-
voice version of a two-voice tune in the Commodore 64 game "Human
Race"). He later did the music for "Jupiter Probe" (Microdeal),
"Warhawk" (Firebird) and "Thrust" (Firebird). His last musical
piece on the Atari was for Elite's "Thundercats". Quite a few of
his composition made it into ST NEWS through the capable hands of
Hustadnes, Frøystein. Also known as Frøykid and the F-word.
Legendary originator of the >Crazy Letters craze. He started
writing them to the ST NEWS crew later 1988, stirred by the ever
crazier writings (especially those involving >sandals) in ST
NEWS. He is the author of the immortal article, "Why the Earth
is Flat". Believed to be very young and tiny, he turned out to be
quite the opposite in real life. Unfortunately, the fact that the
ST NEWS crew had bought him a red-blue-and-yellow plastic toy
truck for him during their >"Norway Quest" may have estranged him
permanently. He is believed to be concentrating on climbing
mountains and attempting to explain the principles of >car
International Coding Conference. Coding conference organised by
the German >Delta Force of Stuttgart. They each took place around
their place of residence. The first one was organised in the
summer of 1990, with the second one taking place from 1 August to
4 August 1991 (covered in a huge >real-time article in ST NEWS
Volume 6 Issue 2). A third one, the so-called Virtual
International Coding Conference, was an event taking place on the
Internet IRC network on 7 November 1995.
International Coding Convention, ST NEWS. See ">ST NEWS
International Christmas Coding Convention".
Interviews. Throughout the history of ST NEWS, the editorial
staff as well as the various co-conspirators have managed to
interview quite a few people of various ilk. A virtually
complete list follows. Computer people: Chris "Maggie" Holland,
Sietse "DBA Magazine" Postma, David "ST Enthusiasts Newsletter"
Mooney, Jeff "Yak the Hairy" Minter (twice), Rob Hubbard, Julian
Reschke, David Whittaker, Alex "Goldrunner II" Herbert, John
"Goldrunner II" Dower, Shiraz Shivji, Jeroen "Maniacs of Noise"
Tel, Steve "Goldrunner" Bak, Stuart "RDD" Coates, Pete Lyon,
Damien M. Jones, Ben Dalglish, John "Nebulus" Phillips, Peter
"Arkanoid" Johnson, Ofir "GEMBench" Gal, Stefan Posthuma, Andy
and Dave (of Volume 11, i.e. "Starball"), Tim "Spitting Image"
Coupe, the Bullfrog Team (of "Populous" fame), Jez "Starglider"
San, the Lost Boys (and later Tim "Manikin" Moss separately),
Tony "Cybernoid" Cooper, Ian "Carrier Command" Oliver, Dan
"NeoDesk" Wilga and Richard "Felice" Spowart. Music people:
Whistler Courbois Whistler, Bernd Steidl, Paradise Lost,
Entombed, Napalm Death, Yngwie Malmsteen, X-Cops, Gwar, Venom, My
Dying Bride, Anathema, Dream Theater, Consolation, Nembrionic
Hammerdeath, Kevin Ferguson, Obituary, At The Gates, Altar,
Septic Flesh, Nightfall, Orphaned Land, Fates Warning and Jens
Johansson. Various other people: Terry "Discworld" Pratchett and
Anne "Dragonriders of Pern" McCaffrey. And, of course, Steven
Spielberg (NOT!). There has even been a hidden article in which
Richard interviewed himself.
'I still have a wishing list of people I'd like to interview,
though. In the computer biz' there are Anthony Crowther and
Martin Galway; in the music biz' there are Steve Vai, Joe
Satriani, Rush, Queensrÿche, Deep Purple, Rainbow and Metallica.
I'd just about give my right arm for those. Film stars? No, they
don't really do much for me. Quentin Tarantino or James Cameron
sound like interesting people, though.' (Richard)
IRC. (Acronym for International Reply Coupon) Small green pieces
of paper with text in various languages on them. When sent with a
letter, they allow the addressee to bring the IRC to the post
office in exchange for a stamp. This way, the addressee does not
have to spend money on postage when the sender expects him or her
to write back. This may seem like a cheapskate thing to do, but
especially when a lot of letters require answering, this is a
'Nothing beats a lot of English people who simply sent English
stamps and expected me to put them on my envelopes that I sent
from the Netherlands. I still wonder whether that was
subconscious arrogance or just plain boneheadedness.' (Richard)
Ivette. A Guatemaltekan girl Stefan met while attending a
computer conference in San Jose, California. Love at first sight
does exist and a relationship ensued. Later, Stefan visited her
in Guatemala and he wrote a story about it in ST NEWS. Long
distance and culture shock ended the relationship about a year
Janssen, Carel. Writer of the long-running "Forth Course", a
series of tutorials which started somewhere in ST NEWS Volume 2
and continued up to the final pre-undead issue, i.e. Volume 5
Issue 1. Carel missed submitting his writings for only one or two
issues, and that was because he had been the unfortunate victim
of a heart attack. Although some people might claim the subject
matter wasn't all that interesting, the articles were always
superbly written and possessed a fine structure.
Jarre, Jean Michel. (b. 24 Aug. 1948) French keyboard virtuoso
who released a fine range of synthesizer albums, starting with
"Oxygene" (1976). ST NEWS Volume 4 Issue 2, of April 1989, was
dedicated to him. He has released 8 studio albums (the latest of
which is "Chronologie") and 4 live albums. He has also released
at least 4 live videos. Particularly "Revolutions" and "Concerts
in China" seemed to be really important parts in the ST NEWS
JBL. The make of Stefan's XPL160 speakers. Massive and powerful,
and sounding exquisite. Much to the chagrin of the Mad Neighbour,
a screaming woman that lived in the appartment below Stefan in
>Oss. When he left for Canada, Stefan sold his >Kenwood stereo,
but refused to part with his beloved JBLs. They are now part of a
home-theatre setup in Stefan's apartment in Toronto, >Canada.
Johansson, Lars. Member of the Swedish crew Flexichron. After Ewe
Håkansson gave up being the official Swedish distributor of ST
NEWS, Lars Johansson became he. Apart from doing the
distribution, he has also contributed to the actual ST NEWS
editorial contents. He also contributed a >real-time article for
a Swedish convention that was to appalling it was refused (the
only ever article refused to be put in ST NEWS; it was basically
a giant load of semi-unknown people saying "fuck" and "shit" a
lot and saying how other people sucked). In the final couple of
issues, he tortured many people by his weird articles and
imagery, some of which had to be made into >hidden articles.
Joyce, Bryan H. Author who wrote the "Tavern at the Edge of the
Universe" stories for ST NEWS, which were pretty brilliant. Last
thing he wrote was a rather personal autobiography.
Karin. (b. 13 July 1973) Richard's second and Final Serious
'To use Stefan's immortal words, a lot of adjectives of
incredible strength have been applied to a variety of girls but
she is The One For Me.' (Richard)
Karsmakers, Richard. (b. 3 Nov. 1967) Founder of ST NEWS and main
writer. Lived in >Helmond until 1988 when, after he'd finished
secondary school (MAVO, HAVO, Atheneum), he went to Utrecht
>University to study Biology. That didn't particularly work out,
so in October 1989 he started working for >Thalion Software in
Germany. There he did translations, novella writing and game
design (he did the level design for >"Leavin' Teramis", the map
design and editing for "Amberstar", and the full design for >"A
Prehistoric Tale"). In April 1991 he'd left Thalion and went to
work for >ACN. That lasted for two months, so he was on the dole
for a month or two before he started his English studies, again
at Utrecht University. At the same time he went to live together
with >Miranda, whom he'd been going steady with since July 1989.
They broke up in September 1994, and >Karin entered his life. He
got his first computer in the summer of 1984, a >Commodore 64
(although he had doubted for a while whether he should perhaps
buy a Sinclair QL). Around Easter 1986 he switched it for an
Atari ST (512 Kb RAM, TOS on disk, SF 354 single-sided disk
drive, monochrome monitor only, and only "ST Logo", "ST Basic",
"DB Master One" and "1st Word" for software). In 1990 he sold it
to upgrade to a MEGA ST2 that he expanded to 4 Mb, which in turn
he sold later after he'd bought a Falcon 030 (4 Mb memory, 340 Mb
hard disk) in October 1993. Even though he hates the mere fact,
he'll be shifting his activities to the PC side of things with
the end of ST NEWS.
'Eventually, I predict gloomly, my Atari-related stuff might be
limited to a "Gemulator".' (Richard)
Kennerley, Bryan. (A.k.a. "The Android") Crazy Welsh bloke who
came pretty close to being an Extravagent English person all on
his own, without help of the actual >Extravagent English at all.
Always eager to talk about a variety of topics - including
guitars, >Malmsteen, sex, kinkiness, perversion, Satriani, TV,
England and Steve Vai - he got into a pretty interesting pen pal
relationship with Richard, which actually culminated into a brief
visit of Bryan to >Utrecht in the summer of 1994 somewhere
`You wouldn't believe some of the stuff this guy wrote. But that
caused me to go really open with him, too. I don't think I've
ever been this open with any ST NEWS readers.' (Richard)
Kenwood. The make of Stefan's mighty stereo system. It produced
many, many hours of music to sustain Stefan during his long
nights of demo coding and also provided music during the many ST
NEWS finishing sessions at Stefan's place. Stefan once extolled
it in "Lost in the Ken Wood", a short piece published in ST NEWS
a long time ago (beginning of 1988, approximately). In Canada,
the system has been replaced by a high-end Sony home-theatre
Klaxos Nine. Reputedly, the most boring planet in the universe.
People consider walking their snails rather too exciting an
event, and would much rather spend their few waking hours
watching the grass grow.