A VISIT TO THE DELTA FORCE INTERNATIONAL CODING CONFERENCE #2
- or -
WHY NOT TO FORGET TO CHEW GUM IN THE TRAIN
FROM HEIDELBERG TO STUTTGART
- or -
VARIOUS OTHER SUBTITLES THAT ARE SUPERFLUOUS
PART VIII
The following writers contributed to this article. The
editorial staff of ST NEWS wishes to stress the fact that each of
the contributors to this article is responsible for what he has
written. We take no responsibility whatsoever except for which we
have written ourselves.
The contributors to this article as a whole, with exception of
the ST NEWS editorial staff, were (in more or less of an
alphabetical order): 2Stein of ST Connexion (Julian), Abel of
Electra (of the Union now!), Alien of ST Connexion, Armin
Hierstetter (of the German mag "TOS"), Axe of Superior, Big Alec
of Delta Force, Bilbo of Ripper Off, Billy Lakefear (?!), Captain
Headcrash of Total Vision Incorporated, Carnera of NPG, Chaos
Inc. of Delta Force, Chris of Unlimited Matricks (ex-The Garlic
Eaters), Crush of the Menacing Cracking Alliance, Daryl of The
Exceptions, Dbug II of NEXT, Deel of Dynamite Dynastie, Dire of
Animi Dux (Birgir, the Insane Icelander), Dogue de Mauve of the
Overlanders, Dr. Death of Light, DTX Sync of Legacy, Duke of The
Respectables (Der Große Dumme), EVE of Galtan Six/ENS, Fishbone
of ST Connexion, Flix of Delta Force, Ford Perfect of Black
Monolith Team (Michael), Fury of Legacy, Furyo of the
Overlanders, Genital Grinder of Alcoholica (Undead Sprog of The
Lost Boys), Gunstick of the Unlimited Matricks, Headcoder of
Digital Vision, Humungus of the Overlanders, Icaruz of Electra
(of the Union now!), Illegal Exception of Scum Of The Earth,
Jacky of Alien Cracking Formation (or Alien Child Fuckers, or
whatever), Jora of Black Monolith Team, Krazy Rex of ST
Connexion, Leviathan of Light, Lowlife of Sewersoft, Mad Max of
The Exceptions, Manikin of The Lost Boys, -ME- of The Exceptions,
Mega Tri of Light, Mr. Bee of the Overlanders, Mr. Spirit of
Mystic, New Mode of Delta Force, One of Galtan Six, Oxygene of
The Lost Boys, Quicksilver of Mystic, Raphael of Scum Of The
Earth, Ray of Delta Force, Relayer of the Quartermass Experiment
(a.k.a. Jurie Hornemann, Code-God of Holland , Master Of The Whip
and J.), Sammy Joe of The Lost Boys (Mike of the "Maggie" Team),
Schnulz, Scum of Sewersoft, Slime of Delta Force, Stick of
Ripped-Off, Tanis of The Carebears (Coprophagic Necrocannibal
Eviscerator of Alcoholica), Timo Schmidt (of the "Maggie" Team),
The Fate of Unlimited Matricks (Maestro), The One of Vector, Thor
of Black Monolith Team, TLS of Black Monolith Team, Toxic Foetus
Eater of Alcoholica (Spaz of The Lost Boys), Tsunoo Rhilty of
Troll & Co (the Lord of STCS), Typhon of the Overlanders, Tyrem
of The Respectables, Vantage of ST Connexion (Klaus) and Vulcan
of Legacy.
This totals to 70 people writing, which is an all-time record in
the history of real-time articles!
24:02 (which is also 00:02)
I am really thinking about going to bed now because I am getting
too tired to think. Perhaps some sleep will help me to recover
from the past few days (and the rum). This is probably the last
from me now, I'll be up and running (walking more probably) in
the morning so till then.
Crush
00:07
This is about as real-time as you can get. The demo screen
competition result are now being cried out by Mr. Posthuma(n).
1st: Overlanders, with 102 points.
2nd: Legacy, with 100 points.
3rd: Respectables, with 98 points.
Furyo of OVR was dragged upstairs and he got a disk that was
painted gold on a plastic solid standing without a disk. He was
overwhelmed with joy so that he could barely ascend the stairs
that lead yet one other step up towards Overlander eternal
stardom.
They have surely come a long way from GfA Basic 'overlamers' to
real coders that deserve their spurs (verdienen hun sporen,
that's Dutch).
The rest, in order of good to really awfully shit: 4th came Electra
(of the Union!) with 97 points, 5th The Lost Boys with 96, 6th
the Black Monolith Team with 69, 7th NAOS with 64, 8th ST
Connexion with 57, 9th Total Vision Incorporated with 49, 10th
the Vegetables with 46, 11th the Alien Child Fuckers with 35
points too much, and 12th came Scum Of The Earth with 26 points
(I actually saw Rapheal praying when people looked at his screen
so I guess he was extolling the wrong God).
I am actually extremely drunk, I think. I also heard that
someone has occupied the matress I have carefully selected and
moved, and I am in a mood for danci...excuse me, fighting if I
can't get a decent night's sleep here.
I bet it's a Frenchie.
I'll rip out his entrails, feast on them and then fuck his eye
holes.
"Yeeeaaahhhhhh..."
Stefan quote
Richard
00:19
Aargh! Obliteration of effervescing remains! Sucking of
succulent pus! Drinking of fluids unpure!
The guy lying on the matress is actually a member of Delta Force
as far as I could judge from his T-shirt (Big Alec), and I am not
going to deprive any of organisers of a decent spot to rest.
Anyway, the matress is wide enough to support two people.
Bacardi is surely showing its effect now. I make some more typos
and I cannot catch any flies any more.
Stefan drools so I suppose he wants to press some keys.
"Cursor fucking! Hè! Aargh! Moan! Come!"
Stefan quote
Richard
00:22
Raaaahaajaaa!!
Faaaabbiaaajjjaaaaahhaaaaaannn!!!!
Kiku!!!
So The Overlanders have won the demo competition. It was a very
nice and freaky screen, so I guess it was kinda OK. I had the
total honor of announcing the three winners.
Richard and Crush and myself are just a slightly tiny bit drunk
from the bottle of Bacardi and this means that it is deathgroan
time!!
But we have to keep a bit quiet outside because the silly
Germans that live here will CALL THE COPS (Happy Mondays) and we
will get into deep shit if they do.
Hello Birgir (Also know as the Icelandic Dude, quite a novelty
here on this convention)!!
Bacardi is nice, but Plantiac still RULES!!
Life is OK too.
Stefan
00:32
Hey!! What is siss?? Ahh. Typing somesssing!! Good..
Who siss iss?? I won't wonna tell ya...
Hey Andechser Doppelbock Bier is real great. Yes. Drink it and
feel better, especially if the routines that you coded don't
work for accessories. Shit. Hey. I haven't written anything
before. Only now I happened to see this lame Mega ST 2 (with 4
meg, however, co-ED.). But I might check in again.
Unknown person
00:Idontgiveashhit
Graapppllooppllaaahahahahahahagglllllppp!!!!lycvjsd!!!!!
Cuntdicksuckfuck!!
Stefan!
00:36
Metallica's "Master of Puppets" is thundering through the gym.
Stefan is being very weird and it's all generally very funny as
everybody is doing stupid things (well, it seems like that to us
as we are very drunk). My God we created so many vibrations that
the entire CD player shook and suddenly the last one minute or so
got replayed.
"Pingelingdepingeling."
Kirk Hammett quote
"Weeweeweeweeweewwee."
Another Kirk Hammett quote
Did you know that James Hetfield had his birthday yesterday? Mr.
Hierstetter is just as mad as we are - and he didn't have any
alcohol as far as I can recall.
Some people are crying their head off. One of them is me.
This is surely one hell of conference! Everybody is very zany
and I like that.
"It's rather loud outside, Richard."
Sprog quote (all of a sudden very serious, like a mother)
Well, if someone the likes of Sprog is being considerate then
some things are surely heavily fucking up the neigbourhood so it
seems. Metallica is the best. Yeah.
Sanitarium.
"Ploing, twing twong."
Third Kirk quote
Yeah sure and all that shit. Everything is, like, really groovy.
I feel utterly and totally terrific and I am going to have an
enormous load of spell-checking to do tomorrow because I just
know I am going to make lots of mistakes because when I am
incapable I even make more mistakes.
"Aaaarrghhhhh...."
Stefan quote
"No locked doors no windows barred
No things to make my dream seems scarred..."
Metallica quote
"Sanitarium."
Yet another quote.
Just leave me alone (i.e. LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!).
Richard
00:43
METALLLLIIICCAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!
Build my fear of what's out there.
WHATEVER!!!!
Fucklkkkkcuuuuunnnnnttttslllluuuttttt!!
"zhzujzjm hnghfv 7zzh zrtws ed hn"
Head quote
I feel totally mad, headbanging, drunk, insane, got some death
to do.
Mirror stares back hard.
Towel!!!
Stefano
00:45
Metallica forever... How can these go on programming, without
breaking their heads on the computers... disgusting. Richard just
keeps drumming like crazy, must have gone to his head, cause he
is not able any longer to cope with the CD player.
He talks to me...drumming again...argl!!
Armin
00:49
We have switched Metallica off in favour of the live CD of Iron
Maiden ("Live After Death") and I am going to type as fast as I
can although I know I will make lots of mistakes but there is
nothing that editing will..."nfr6zgujk" (head quote)...not be
able to get rid of.
Heavy Metal galore!
Arrrgghhh!
Burp!
This is FUCKING GREAT!
I have never been to a party like this even though I am making a
lot (LOT) of mistakes I know that I am typing FAST FAST FAST!!
Some asshole just turned off the light and we are now
all..."8iuuui" (Armin tongue quote)...shouting out heard off.
Fucking gross. Suddenly, when it is dark, everybody feels one
can safely shout without being recognised.
I think Armin may have had some alcohol after all.
I might even find that I lose my usual self-control. My keys
have become slightly slippery though, as Mr. Hierstetter's tongue
is really a very wet thing.
Slime is really a spoil-sport. He just turned down the maximum
volume because he said the police would otherwise appear soon.
Fucking neighbourhood. They don't have any concept of the joy we
have when we are going out of our skull.
I am making dozens of mistakes but I DON'T GIVE A FUCK!
I am now intoxicated enough to go and have a bit of sleep.
Bye. I think that I will sleep at the very moment I hit the bag
(not my mother).
All I can say before I faint on the stage is that Tanis is
putting back on Metallica.
Yeah. Fucking A!
Richard
01:00
Here's Fishbone typing for the first time during this conference
on that fucking QWERTZU ST... Since we didn't take the time to
eat this evening, we (ST Connexion and me) are now experimenting
with some sandwiches made up of bread, paprika crips and warm
Coke. The result is quite ugly, but not as disgusting as what I
got yesterday at the local Pizzeria: The Spaghetti alla Carbonara
I got almost made me puke for 4 hours. Never buy anything but
pizzas in German pizzerias...
Fishbone (Fischebouenesch, Vantage)
01:11
Plantiac rules, but it's on summer recess unfortunately. The
stuff we got into our metabolism is pretty effective as well,
however, and we are still not devoid of any of the alcoholic
effects.
I am ashamed of the me I portrayed above, really I am (I am
writing this in case my mother reads this - but she's a bitch any
way).
I do not have the cloggiest idea what to write. I seem to recall
some Metallica in my very recent past, but I intend to neglect
recalls of this until tomorrow. Then I will read this article and
laugh heartily - or be thoroughly ashamed.
"You will be."
Crush quote (when reading this text in the morning)
(This is actually a nice time paradox. Think about it, co-ED.)
Richard
01:17
"Quiet!!!!!"
New Mode quote (because Metallica's "Damaged Inc." being loud)
"Excuse me, I couldn't hear you because the music was so loud."
Yours truly quote
Stefan goes to bed, and so will I. Beddy byes! Bye! Bye! Chant!
Hail! See you tomorrow (when we will have leather tongues).
Yours truly (me) (not -ME-) (i.e. Richard)
Between 01:17 and the next text, as I have no watch...
Finally they switched this shitty music off... Richard and
Stefan are really pissed and there are some more people who also
didn't know where their limits are... But most of them have now
gone to bed, or, rather, to a sleeping bag. This is the first
time in 4 days that I write something in this text and I think
that it's enough now - I just wanted to say 'Hello' to nearly
everybody who was, or rather is, here or not...
See ya.
The Fate, also called Maestro, of Unlimited Matricks
01:30
Almost all gfx-men are now working in order to do a picture for
a "we don't know what we will do with dis yet" picture but I'm
sure that the result will be bloody great even if ES of TEX and
Gogo of TCB have left the party so that they can't do anything.
Too bad!!!
Furyo
01:47
What Furyo just said is quite true: Even Krazy Rex (Krégirèche
rules the world!) is drawing his first new gfx in three years...
Okay, it's a stupid yellow Pacman with a pointed tongue, horns
and a forked tail, but it's new gfx anyway...
Fishbone
03:00
Everything is very quiet here now, except for a soundtrack or
two playing in the background... Manikin, Fury, Daryl and
Gunstick seem to be coding some things, though I don't think
they're doing it extremely seriously. We are preparing a little
ST network for a six-player "Midi Maze" contest involving me,
Ajrarn, PixelKiller and other Legacy members. Krazy Rex
(Portuguesch forever!) is still roaming around, though he's going
to have to drive us back home tomorrow morning (that's a 650
kilometers drive to Paris). Oh, I almost forgot: The whole
Electra team is working extremely seriously one some quite arcane
pieces of code and/or clean pieces of artwork; they seem to be
the only human beings still able to WORK now (I discovered that
Fury and Gunstick were actually drawing some highly stupid
pictures with "Degas Elite").
Fishbone
03:05
Fishbone, you have the humour of the son of a mutant camel. We
were CODING, not drawing!!!
Fury
03:13
Fishbone is right when he says that everything is quiet now:
Some people have already left the party, most of the people still
here are sleeping, trying to recover from the lack of sleeping
hours from the previous days/nights. Sammy Joe of TLB, 2Stein and
all the others just came back from their disco (the usual!). They
seem to have had a good time ("testing beer", quote from 2Stein).
I personally am quite tired, despite the fact that I slept my
eight hours last night... Tomorrow Cregiresch will drive us back
home to Paris, let's hope that he won't be too exhausted, but he
shouldn't: After all, he has slept every night in the car alone,
leaving us poor souls inside, forced to sleep on the floor.
Grumble, grumble... Not only did he sleep in a nice place, but he
also slept a lot. Even after that, he claims that he is dead
tired (he does look like that, honestly)... Cregiresch is getting
older. Not so long ago, he could handle sleepless nights without
any major difficulties. Cregiresch tou te faische vieuche!
Klaus (of the lazybrains, better known as ST Connexion)
04:29
Our attempt at a "Midi Maze" was a complete fiasco: We weren't
able to get the network to work properly. Our state of exhaustion
added to our hunger (thanks Klaus for that!) and our limited
mental capacities (especially concerning Ajrarn and Alien) made
us zmüzmüzmüzmüzmülóóztällmörwutzakyxzê.
Electra (the stinky bastards!), ULM and Alcoholica are currently
organizing a lame-demo contest (too bad that Poltergeist won't
participate 'coz they've got lot of experience in this field).
Gunstick's screen is a very clever piece of extremely slow code,
but Alcoholica's screen has got a lot of nice colors in it... I
really don't know who's going to win, all the screens seem to be
particularly awful.
Fishbone (plus Ajrarn, Alien and Pixel Killerech watching)
04:30
To sleep or not to sleep that is the real quesZZZZZNOOOORE...
Billy Lakefear
05:05
There are still 15 or 16 persons awake here, and there is a lot
of hideous soundchip music playing. I'm going to find myself a
table to lie under.
Fishbone
05:30
I'm not really happy, 'coz my screen was refused to enter the
demo-competition... I never hoped to win, but that's not really
agreable to work all a day on a screen and to hear: "Sorry, it's
too late for you...!".
The problem is that I have not finished the screen too late, but
only the improvements (Intro screen) on it: The whole screen was
ready for a long time. Fucking day.
I managed to do a very great performance this afternoon: Alien
and Nic had to use "Neochrome" to do some graphics! In fact, I'm
really happy of this: Alien's graphics are very "amusants"...
This keyboard is very boring, and I made many typing errors...
So let's wrap !
Dbug II (Alias the Crazy-Graph'n Coder guy... for the music wait
a little moment please. I must do some training!)
06:01
It's now 6 o'clock in the morning and I came back to this ST. I
have been up all the time. It has become quite quiet now except
for some soundchip music that those Frenchy guys always play at
full volume. Arrgghh. Hmmm.... Right now there are...1...2...3...
4...5...6...7...8...9...10...11 guys awake. The others are
sleeping under the table. Oh well, all in all I think the party
is boring. They should have invited the Replicants and the Empire
for some interesting arguments... Yawn. I am tired now. Anyway, I
wonder who reads articles like these! Not me. Enough for today!
Bye!!
Axe
07:14
Well, we have to go! I'm too lazy to write more text. Sorry, but
don't forget it: TSUNOO RHILTY IS ALIVE!
Yes he is!
See you later with Sabine.
Tsunoo Rhilty from TROLL & CO (alias the Lord form STCS)
07:17
Wo. Since I wasn't able to find an unoccupied undertable, I
experienced sleeping on a chair using an ST as a pillow. The
result on my face was quite funny according to my neighbours, but
I didn't get a lot of sleep...
Fishbone
07:20
Hello. Mr. Spirit of Mystic is writing to you for the first and
the last time. In one hour we leave the party therefore I just
write a little message. This last night was very interesting. All
the other people are tired and only the best managed to stay
awake. There were Nic (good future demo), Dbug II, Oxygene, New
Mode (always laughing!), some members of ACF, Axe, Tsunoo Rhilty,
Fishbone and me...
Well, it's all for now. I must go....
Bye.
Mr Spirit
08:12
YEAH! what a great party! I have enjoyed it a lot. Thanx again
to Delta Force! The end is coming...snif...but see you soon with
another mega product from Legacy.
DTX Sync of Legacy (hey, the 2nd at the ICC #2 competition!!)
08:24
Conversation between Crush and One.
One: "Richard's Virus Killer says your (CIA's) ST has four
megabytes but it has only three meg."
Crush: "Well it's programmed by Karsmakers"
One: "Yes, and it shows."
Yes dear reader, after about 9 hours of sleep (I slept in the
car) I'm back. When I walked in, I said goodbye to some Legacy
members that were leaving with their second prize (which I
haven't seen - I'm interested to see what it is).
I hope I'm not gonna act the same way as I feel, because I don't
know how zombies are supposed to act.
Crush
09:05
The bread is too fucking dry.
Those fucking bakeries should keep their shops open on Sundays!
Raph / SOTE
09:30
Yawn, stretch. I am here. I am sortof awake.
I vaguely remember doing silly things last night. The sleeping
in the car was quite pleasant I must say.
Stefan
09:40
And I am awake as well. I feel like a million bucks - but
counterfeit ones. I do not have a hangover but I feel very
knackered. I think I slept too much, really. On a conference like
this, one should not be able to get more than 4 or five hours of
sleep a night, and when you get about 8 than your body refuses to
accept this.
I think I look like a corpse or something, so I think I'll have
a have a go at washing and that stuff - for the last time during
this conference.
"*FART!*"
Anal muscle quote (very relieved)
I am disappointed about the amount of stuff that was written
tonight. I suppose the Ripped Offs didn't get drunk. I can tell
you from personal experience that nothing is as inspiring as
being drunk.
But I wanna go.
Richard
10:00
Incredibly enough, this is Mr. Bee on this keyboard...
Nothing special to say, except that this conference was great.
Many thanks to Delta Force and their friends for the
organisation, and now some 'Hi' to all cool guys I have met:
Manikin, Digital Insanity, New Mode, Jacky, Lem & Nic, French
guys, etc., etc.
And don't forget Tsunoo Rhilty, one of the first guys on ST.
That's all...
Mr. Bee/OVR
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The text of the articles is identical to the originals like they appeared
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