"Poverty needs more money than anything else."
Sir Thomas More, "Utopia"
SOMETHING THAT HAS NOTHING WHATSOEVER TO DO WITH COMPUTERS:
THE MONSTERS OF ROCK FESTIVAL, SEPTEMBER 1ST 1991, NIJMEGEN
by Richard Karsmakers
Praise the Lords of English!
These are the first ever writings of yours truly after having
been at some English lessons at University. Although all I
learned was a bit about poetry (vehicles, metaphores, similes,
symbols, etc.), the sheer thought should suffice for my English
burblings to be better.
I heard things about imagery, and imagism, and a poem about a
Red Wheelbarrow (which I found quite silly).
My neck aches. My voice is totally busted.
Isn't that interesting for you to know?
Note to Jurie: Please excuse my use of the word 'burblings', but
I just liked it a lot. Be glad I didn't precede it with
'exhalted' or something.
End of note.
Note to Jurie (Volume II): Although you have introduced the word
'burblings' in the 'noun' meaning of the word, it is my duty to
inform you that such a word does not exist. There is a verb,
though, of which the infinitive is burble. This is a portmanteau
word, i.e. a word with two or more words contained in it, such as
typically used by Lewis Carroll in his books ("Alice in
Wonderland" and "Throught the Looking Glass"). To 'burble' means
to bleat, murmur and warble simultaneously (no kiddin').
End of note (Volume II).
For the entire month of August I had been looking forward to the
concert in quite an enormous way; after all, two of my abso-
copulating-lutely favourite bands were to appear - Queensrÿche
and Metallica (yeah!).
The week before the event I had already met some students
English that were going there so we had agreed to get together at
11:30 at Utrecht Central Station. From there, we would try to
catch a train that would eventually bring us to Nijmegen, a town
in the east of Holland.
This was not as easy as we had anticipated.
The platform was crammed with the scum of the nation, amongst
which us, seven students English. People wearing tattered
Metallica T-shirts, horny floozies wearing nothing much and that
sort. The train that arrived was already quite full when it
pulled to a stop for us to get in. However, using our elbows, we
succeeded in getting aboard relatively unscathed. Some of us
could even be seated.
The Nederlandse Spoorwegen (i.e. "Dutch Railroads", the Dutch
equivalent of British Rail) had once again severely screwed up.
There were no extra trains, even though they had promised some.
The platform was bulging with people and they all had to get into
one shitty little train.
Then something happened that really took the biscuit: Everybody
who vaguely resembled a headbanger and who was still standing in
the train had to get out. This is bloody discrimination if I ever
saw it! Damn those railroad cops!
After many tribulations we finally got to Nijmegen, however. We
had to take another train that used a somewhat longer route.
Nonetheless, it assured us of a timely arrival.
Nijmegen Central Station was, again, completely running over
with the aforementioned scum of the nation, among whom was I.
There were some extra buses, but these were all bulging as well.
Some real scum (the kind even I would like to see shot) was
singing obscene songs at bus drivers. Bastards.
One bus eventually succeeded in bringing us the the football
stadium where the concert was held - the local soccer club
probably had the first sell-out in its stadium in many months!
I bought some T-shirts: One Queensrÿche "Building Empires" and
one "Metallica" with the four heads that are also on the inside
of their latest CD's booklet. Wow, what a cult T-shirt. I tied it
around my head for it was really excruciatingly hot and I didn't
want to get a headache - I have quite short hair. The sun peered
down at us mercilessly from a perfectly light blue sky. It was
still high and it burnt with a vigour that refused to relent.
Sweating, I went as near to the stage as one could get.
Unfortunately, there was an elite pit right before us. Only
people with yellow thingies around their wrists were allowed to
get in there - only people that had spent the night in front of
the entrance had gotten these.
At first I really disliked this second case of discrimination.
Later, however, it turned out that sound quality was better where
I stood. Also, we got more water thrown over us and the general
atmosphere was better.
It all started off at 3 PM. Somehow, the many wasps that had
been a nuisance throughout the wait, had disappeared. They had
probably retreated to the sides, waiting for a new opportunity to
strike without the risk of colliding with flailing hair or
banging hairdos. The entire first hour, however, could be
dismissed as it was aurally filled by a band called "Black
Crowes". What a load of shit that was. It was a cross of the
typical L.A. hardrock band (including a singer with a Fabian
factor of at least 5) and a kind of bad Deep Purple. Crap.
But at least I could use the time to elbow me way to the very
front of the large pit, right behind a security area that
separated us from the aforementioned elite pit.
I already witnessed most of what the Black Crowes played quite
from the front, but when they ended I was right at the front.
Several thousands of people pushed at me from behind. In front of
me stood a rather sturdy iron fence. I had to strain my belly
muscles not to have the fence's rail imprinted in me. From both
sides, people were trying to push me away. They wanted to be
where I was! Ha! I am about a dozen times stronger as usual
during a concert. They couldn't get me away and instead had to be
satisfied with a spot directly behind me.
That's how I like concerts. Nobody but a fence in front of you.
Close to people throwing water. Space to bang with your head and
the entire part of your body from your waist up. That's the stuff
I like.
At 16:15, Queensrÿche started - one of the very best bands ever
to occur in the Heavy Metal scene. Their appearance during
Monsters of Rock was criticised a lot, but for me all was
brilliant. Geoff Tate was singing with a good voice and the other
musicians were as smooth and professional as I had seen them be
during the "Empire" tour (see ST NEWS Volume 5 Issue 2). Of
course, they did not get a chance at much contact with the
audience and they couldn't play as much as everybody would have
liked. But the songs they played were performed immaculately,
professionally, full of feeling. I think Queensrÿche has written
some beautiful love songs, songs that made me wish Miranda was
standing in front of me, ready to be held tight. Songs like "Jet
City Woman", "I Don't believe in love", "Eyes of a Stranger" and
the last song they played, "Silent Lucidity", definitely fit into
this category.
In total, they had played about 13 or 14 songs by the time they
left the stage, at half past five.
Security people had taken long to discover that we were all
dehydrating. The sun was attempting to fry us at the spot, and
frantic body movements did the rest. Only during the last two or
three songs they had started throwing water over us. Thank God
they continued until the end. You've got no idea how frenetically
hot and damp it can become in front of a concert crowd unless
you've been there.
It took much too long before Metallica started. Well, it has to
be said that any time would be too long here. Metallica are just
the prime band. I was glad to be able to see them from this prime
position.
They started at 16:00. The sun was already diminishing its
frying attempts slightly, which allowed everybody to freak out
even more. There had been a couple of divers (people who find a
way of getting on top of the crowd and then move forwards until
in the security area) during Queensrÿche, but many more came
during Metallica - probably because the music is slightly more
heavy, too. I once got a leather boot straight in my neck and a
girl next to me got one in her face. Smeared with blood and a
busted nose she had to be taken to the first aid people. I really
hate those diving mother fuckers (excuse my words, but that's
what they really are). They really spoil a lot of the fun one can
have at a Metal concert; you have to be constantly aware of
people coming over from the back instead of just being able to
unreservedly flip out and bang your head and torso off.
Enough said about this lamers of the Heavy Metal world.
Something else happened during the Metallica gig - I had put
down the T-shirt I had tied around my head, just before me on the
other side of the fence in the security area. One song before the
end of the Metallica part some absolute c.cksucker had swiped it!
Those were about the only negative points (be they not too
small) of the concert. Metallica primarily played old classics
("For Whom the Bell Tolls", "Seek & Destroy", "Harvester of
Sorrow", "Fade to Black", "Creeping Death", "Last Caress",
"Whiplash", "One", "Am I Evil", "Master of Puppets" (part) and
"Battery"), as well as two songs off their new CD - "Enter
Sandman" and the best song on it, "Sad but True". They played
about twenty seconds of guitar-only "Wherever I Roam", after
which they quit and said "Only rehearsing!" They stopped at a
quarter past five.
Metallica was great, as always. So far I have seen these guys
three times and each time has been a momentous occasion, even
though the previous one (flippin' two and a half hours at the
Dortmund Metal Hammer Festival, see ST NEWS Volume 5 Issue 2) was
best of all.
Acheing in just about all parts of my body, I retreated from the
crowd after the last sight of Metallica members had become
history. This is what a good concert was supposed to be like. You
had to feel pain everywhere but in your mind and your heart.
Monsters of Rock 1991 was one of those concerts. Just amazingly
awesome.
The concert was not over, however. The headline act was yet to
come: ACDC. I do not particularly like this band, and I had even
toyed with the thought of leaving already so that the trains
would not yet be full when I went home.
Alas! I paid 55 Dutch guilders for all of it and I am, after
all, Dutch. I decided to stay to see the headline act as well. It
wasn't actually disappointing, I have to admit. ACDC played for
about two hours, starting at eight, and they did all their
classics. Their stage show was really nice. Angus Young (the
guitarist in college shorts that bangs his head all the time) is
really an awfully funny character and the audience was easily
aroused. Enormously sized inflatible dolls appeared on the stage
and on its sides. Very nice. During a somewhat lengthy striptease
act, Angus Young eventually pulled down his pants - revealing the
back of his pair of boxer shorts with the Dutch flag on them!
Deafening applause. I had never thought that the Dutch were such
a chauvinist bunch. But we are.
Of all the songs that they played, I can remember only a few. Of
course, "A Whole Lotta Rosie" was played - as well as "Let There
Be Rock" and "Money", the latter with thousands of fake '1
dollar' bills flying through the air with Angus' portrait on it.
They ended with "For Those About To Rock", with shots of the
over 20 cannons that were places on top of the whole thing that
kept the lighting and stuff into the air. Very impressive, and
surely equally deafening.
After the concert ending at ten, the quest for the finding of a
bus and a train to Utrecht started. Although both were filled to
the brim with (mostly drunk or otherwise intoxicated)
headbangers, it all went very smoothly. Eventually I even got to
catch the last but from Utrecht Central Station to where I live.
At almost one o'clock at night I was already in bed. My ears were
making funny noises, trying to keep me awake. I slept quickly
nonetheless.
Disclaimer
The text of the articles is identical to the originals like they appeared
in old ST NEWS issues. Please take into consideration that the author(s)
was (were) a lot younger and less responsible back then. So bad jokes,
bad English, youthful arrogance, insults, bravura, over-crediting and
tastelessness should be taken with at least a grain of salt. Any contact
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